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This week-end, my husband , Mark, struck up a conversation with a cook who was preparing his order. During the conversation, the pleasant young man remarked how he didn’t like the situation with the cooking oil that fried the pork also mingled with the other fried foods. He told Mark that his faith, Islam, prohibited the eating of pork. When the young man went outside for a cigarette break, Mark pointed out that he was concerned about defiling his body, yet he smoked. Then he shared about his Christian faith and his stance on dietary commandments. Then Jason told Mark he used to be a Christian.

A Facebook friend asked for prayer on her Facebook page. She was devastated about her boyfriend’s best friend committing suicide. She shared how wonderful and gifted he was and everyone’s shock about the shocking tragedy. As I basked in the warm sun, my heart suddenly ached for all the precious people who thought ending their life was the only way to end their torment. Even Christins were suicidal and I wondered what the missing link was.

Two other Christian brothers were also enduring a season of “disconnectness”.I continued to think about the various states of human emotion, embracing of life connection. The exquisite bed of soft solitude allowed me to even more deeply empathize with the emotion of alienation. I wondered what catalysts caused such separation in the spirit that ne would end their life. I continued to open my spirit to Holy Spirit for more understanding and insight. I thought of the Beatle’s Eleanor Rigby, John Lennona and Paul McCartney merely scratched the surface.

My thoughts went to a few relationships in my own life which had been severed suddenly by the other person. I felt very sad, having done all I could to reach out in love with a gifts and words of love. In both cases, the other person was a continual talker and most of the conversation was from their viewpoint. I must admit my weakness in not enjoying long, mostly one-sided long discourses . These people are insightful and intelligent, but their inability to venture out of themselves makes intimacy (and the continuation of the realtionship) difficult. Being so challenged with the TMJ- jaw-Dystonia issue, I need to limit my speaking. But if I am inspired by the equality and graciousness of the conversation, (not consisting extraneous verbiage and long-winded rambling). It can be draining and not edifying. And usually when the person talks for son long, I usually forget what I wanted to say!

Stimulation and inspiring conversationalist are rare. As I’ve often mentioned in many of my blogs and teachings walking in God’s excellence encompasses every aspect of life, particularly communicating and relationships. I believe poor communication, (with God and with each other) skills and self-centeredness is one great cause of sickness.

Stimulation and inspiring conversationalist are rare. As I’ve often mentioned in many of my blogs and teachings walking in God’s excellence encompasses every aspect of life, particularly communicating and relationships. I believe poor communication, (with God and with each other) skills and self-centeredness is one great cause of sickness.

God ordained marriage and family for His glory and companionship Today, dependence on technology, (whoever instantaneous and far-reaching) has caused a great deficiency and quality of substance. Some keep in touch through emailing and texting, but there is truly nothing as fulfilling and nurturing as one on one, face to face contact.

Koinonia, (intimate fellowship) is a very fragile and complicated skill-attribute which can only be nourished by Holy Spirit. Koinonia is more than socializing, fellow shipping or hanging out. Koinonia is an unselfish desire to reach out with genuine interest and passion . It is also humbling ones own superiority in favor of allowing another to freely express himself.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. Pual wrote in Phil 2:4 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

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Koinonia, intimacy, is a very fragile and complicated skill which can only be nourished by Holy Spirit. Koinonia is more than socializing, fellow shipping or hanging out. Koinonia is an unselfish desire to humble ones own self in favor of allowing another to freely express himself. My prayer is that this precious revelation Holy Spirit gave me today, will will more illuminate the all in the body of Christ!

The Bible describes a special relationship between David and Jonathan in I Sam. 18:1 .

The soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.

Do we love each other as our own souls, or do we just tolerate each other. If an experienced elder gives us advice, are we resentful of offended> Do we disdain those who are not as intelligent or educated as us? Do we even go as far to severe a  connection because of an irreconcilable difference? There are times to separate, (if the difference is spiritually or emotionally wounding) and minister from afar if there are urgent physical needs. We should keep in mind the urgency of staying together in these very dark times. The government and the non-believing world will not be the shelter when disaster hits! It is the haven of the body of Christ which will be the safe place.

Since every child of God, is adopted into the royal family, we are all called to unity Eph 4:12

The following verses are some of the most sobering verses in the Bible regarding our quality of stewardship and collectively participating with the building of God’s house!

1 Cor 3 11-15 For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ. 12 Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; 13 Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is.14 If any man’s work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward.15 If any man’s work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.

The bottom line, I ask holy Spirit daily, am I building up Father’s house or…am I tearing it down? God’s plan is to equip the saints for works of ministry, to build up the body of Christ, When God’s people start empathizing and show genuine interest in each other, we won’t feel, unloved, isolated and rejected. We will find purpose, joy and fulfillment in family, marriage and our love walk with God.

Heavenly Father, please pour you sweet Holy Spirit in even more glorious ways upon your body. So many lonely people are isolated, misunderstood and disregarded. Each one of us is special, fashioned by your won majestic hands, Father, let us continually forgive and let those who who hurt or offend us, also consider and ask forgiveness, so your family can be the LIGHT of the world You called her to be. Father mend the broken hearts in all of us and help us to be honest with You first and then with each other. Help us to take the lower seat, to get out of ourselves and to be interested in the interests of others! That will be a connective bond to draw us closer. Let us all, realize that none of us knows everything and if we humble ourselves and calls ourselves students of life, we will enjoy the wonderful of friendship and Koinonia. In Jesus name, amen.

God bless you beloved and may this post bring you into growth!

FELLING the GIANT, Lyme Disease

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Lyme Disease is a killer, of mind body and spirit. It is insidious and deadly, almost unconquerable. I’ve met many precious folks on Facebook’s  Christian Lyme Disease group and am astounded at the suffering and hopelessness.  As a journalist, I feel obligated to help my brethren in their journey to wellness and victory.

I have learned so much since being diagnosed in 1992, right in the middle of my  musical journey with my boyfriend-lead guitarist, Chris, (who also was diagnosed  years after me).  God blessed us with an anointed calling to share the Gospel through our unique brand of Gospel hard rock, folk-rock, blues and jazz. My heart was skipping beats, I became weak with dizziness and my mind was foggy. My life exploded at the doctor’s  diagnosis of Lyme Disease!  I was terrified and overwhelmed with the thought of having to drive myself from Seaside park to Red bank, NJ where Rosephin intravenous anti-biotics would be administered for thirty-one days straight. I could not miss one day, or the Lyme would  become aggressive and overtake my immune system.

God got me through the devastating season, but  several months later, the symptoms returned, this time with a vengeance. I had to endure another bout of anti-biotic, this time Amoxicillin. I felt better for a brief couple of months, but then soon noticed I was feeling debilitated very easy. I caught everyone’s cold and my lungs were continually congested. Within several months, I was close to Bronchitis and Pneumonia  very often and one bout was so bad, I almost died. I had no medical insurance, but was blessed by my Christian ministry organization who paid for my examination and treatment by a walk-in clinic physician. he told me I was very close to dying!

After that frightful tenure, my health took a downward spiral and I could not work. I ended up having to  support myself as a live-in companion to an elderly gentleman. Pop cared about me and was even more concerned about my fragile health. He was so concerned that he ordered me to find someone to diagnose my latest condition. The neighbor across the street recommended a fine holistic chiropractor who was very affordable and I made an appointment with him. After sharing the story of my Lyme Disease anti-biotic treatments, he diagnosed me as having Candida, a mold proliferation of the body. I’d never heard of this strange disease with the musical name, but accepted the  protocol.   Now I knew why I had such an insatiable craving for starches and breads. They were fueling my system. I was put on a  low sugar diet with intense ant-fungal supplements. It was the hardest  diet I’d ever been on. After a month, I was feeling better, but recovery was slow. It was hard to discipline myself to even take a short walk for exercise each day. Worse was having no treats, like the starches my body was addicted to.


The Candida-Lyme battle lasted about two years because the craving for soft bread and pasts was so intense. The lack of proper nutrition, the  brain fog and damage to my immune system made me almost clinically depressed. It was a miracle to take care of Pop, the house we lived in and pursuing my music projects. Amazingly, God kept me together  My neighbors, (the Christian couple who recommended the great chiropractor) invited me to their church. Now I had a church family to help me carry the load of my temporary  disability. Even though, my pastor and my fellow brethren didn’t understand my illness, my involvement in a church family reminded me to rely on my faith in the Lord. Part of being a committed child of God aspiring to maintain victory, no matter what!  I vowed to  address the LYME-Candida episode as a temporary season which Father would bring me through. If I was ever to soar into my destiny, I had to make some serious changes in my attitude and ability. I had a great calling and many gifts o share with the body of Christ. We  must never accept this demonic health attack as permanent, otherwise, we will never be whole and healed! My season with this brutal disease, brought me to new levels of fitness, natural health and wisdom on how to care for my temple. .

Father God has given us everything we need for abundant health, but sadly His people,(millions of them) are bound by disease and-or mental illness. I’m grateful for the wellspring I have learned and am the better for it. Since He has granted me the victory of overcoming and soaring forward in my calling, (as a recording artist-song-writer, journalist, artist and soul-sculptor)  I feel obligated to impart my wisdom and expertise who are presently suffering from Lyme, (and other catastrophic illnesses).’

I first urge you all to surrender your whole body and being to your Heavenly Father. This is the first and foremost step to your journey of healing. At times, it may be impossible because of extreme and incessant pain to focus, but try your best to remind yourself of His protection of your life.Begin each day in worship and devotion to your Heavenly Father who cares about you more than you can imagine. He didn’t give Lyme to you, satan did. That being said, here is my prayer

Abba Heavenly Father,  please lead my precious  brother or sister sister  into your green pasture of protection and provision. Holy Spirit, please let your healing waters flow from their belly. Lead them into all wisdom and revelation through applying your  promises to their lives and perspectives. Lead them to the  godly practitioners who have knowledge of your natural healing. Father,  Give them counselors who can help them address any generational or ancestral curses and sins (such as involvement in free-masonry,  Santeria, the occult-witchcraft)  as well as any roots of bitterness unforgiveness and anger. You call us to freedom and it is harder for some of us than others, but You will work out all things for our good if we humble ourselves under your hand. Thank You Father for your love, healing and mercy, in Jesus name, amen.

After committing ourselves to daily prayer and worship, there are three books, I highly recommend to extricate yourself from the “death” mindset of serious illness, whether it be Lyme, Disease, Cancer, MS, Lupus, etc. Many diseases have a spiritual root. I never knew this from any churches I ever went to. This discovery was one of the most miraculous in  walking towards the first step of healing.

The Bull’s Eye Rash from a  tick bite.


Here are three of the most comprehensive aids for healing


Pastor Henry Wright is an amazing man of God with divine wisdom and insight into the roots of sickness



This is one of my favorite books! It has powerful healing prayers and declarations to  speak each day! This one is a must have!

I also highly suggest deliverance counseling ministry. Disease is not always our fault, sometimes it came from our parents, grandparents or ancestors. Imagine my surprise when my deliverance counselors was given a word of knowledge, that I had a Santeria curse And Freemasonry in my family line! Children who had parents involved in Freemasonry have lung issues.

Health Protocols-Disciplines

I would not be alive today if it were for my passionate desire for  knowing my Heavenly Father, Jesus and being led by Holy Spirit..If you are not committed to worshiping and being Father’s commandment, you will not be free…to heal. Obeying His commandments is not just going to church, attending Bible studies or even saying prayers. It is intimate relationship! In intimacy with Father and Jesus, you will find peace even in the strum of sickness and suffering. The following list contain the essential of healing and peace.Do not focus on the intensity of your storm or the unfairness of why you are suffering?  Of course we all ask these questions in the beginning, but try to move forward and face the reality. Father knows it all:)

  1. Begin your day with worship, Thanksgiving and communion with Your heavenly Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit. Keep anointed worship music ( not Christian pop…worship-praise music) on. demonic spirits cannot tolerate praise and worship. They can’t assault you. That atmosphere draws God’s mercy and love and makes it repugnant for depression and spirits of death.
  2.  Read all you can about how your immune systems work and the chief detoxifying organs the especially the gut, where the main action takes place. Garden of Life, Primal Defense pro-biotic is an outstanding.
  3.  I was a victim or child abuse and domestic violence, (as an adult). Any long term emotional and/or physical trauma will deplete the Adrenal glands and Thyroid. You may want to get testing for this. I take a high quality Adrenal and Thyroid supplement. Make sure you  get your doctors approval for  supplements.
  4.  My lung have suffered many assaults over the years from allergies, (hay fever, dust and mold) so I was prone to Bronchitis. I now take Clear Lungs from Ridgecrest
  5. With the many drugs and different anto-biotics, the liver and detoxifying organs incur much damage. Milk Thistle has been a godsend for me. I also take raw cilantro and parsley which are very good for the cleansing of the body.
  6. Mercury poisoning seems to accompany many Lyme Victims, I’ve discovered Alpha Lipoic  Acid and Glutiathione are detoxifiers.
  7.  Your immune system does not recover well from any type of stress or environmental toxins, pesticides and chemicals.  Lypo-Spheric Vitamins C amazingly strengthens my system when I’m taxed.
  8.  A wonderful tincture for Lyme is Una de Gato by NutriCology.
  9.  Other anti-oxidants are E,  A, B complex
  10.  There are many other God-given natural supplements and  natural modalities
  11.  Get informed and acquainted with world class, Christian practitioners who are experts in natural healing. Many of these have successful programs on Christian TV and internet. Here are some of my favorites. I urge you to GOOGLE, go to the Library in research an/or buy books dealing with your different symptoms, (condition)      a. Doug Kaufman, Know the Cause (The fungus Link) .
  12.  Doctor Mercola, an outstanding  natural doctor,
  13.   I first learned about Candida and fungus from reading Dr’ William Crook’s book,
  14. Rest and good sleep are essential for the body to restore itself. Don’t forget the importance of calcium and magnesium. My favorite sleep enhancer is CALM.  I get it from Vitamin Shoppe and they have their own, cheaper brand.. Take twice a day. Calm soothes the nerves and it good for restlessness
  15.  Camomile tea and other claming teas are great taken twice a day.


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I is the glory of God to conceal a thing: but the honour of kings is to search out a matter. Proverbs 25:2

Do you see the opulent glory of the king’s and Queen’s attire? Take a closer look at their stance. Do you see yourself as a King or Queen? Well, you are. The Bibles says that we are kings and priests ministering to our great and mighty God. If you are living or embracing the mindset of a pauper,  ( the choice is always ours), than it’s high time to examine the reasons being your thinking. Perhaps you were taught by your parents or teachers to  respond to life  and circumstances in a certain way. Perhaps  pastors or Sunday school teachers taught you to  decipher the scriptures in a black or white extreme or  very rigid and unmerciful. Both of these types of teaching lead to emotional and spiritual bondage and a very joyless, shallow knowledge of God’s word and person. First and second chapters of Colossians, boasts the glorious treasures  God has ordained for us to receive and walk in.

Father wishes for to be whole, healed and in living in abundance. 3 John 1:2. Why are so many brothers and sisters living defeated and miserable lives? Their very faces show the  state they are in, perpetually disgruntled, scrutinizing their brethren in grey areas of conviction and  having a negative outlook on life and the  future. No wonder non-believers have no interest in coming to Christ! Is this you, beloved?Maybe it’s time for a Holy Ghost reality check.

Why are some Christian overflowing in abundance and joy and others are in perpetual lack and depression. We can know that the joy of the Lord is our strength. In this context, Nehemiah 8:10, Joy is not an event of good fortune or a sudden happy event.  The Hebrew in this case means that we are enjoined and in the secure protection of our God! In many Psalms in the Bible, Yahweh Jehovah is our high tower, buckler and  shield. Knowing this deeply in your spirit, shoudl never cause you to stay for long periods of time in helpless depression. We are never hoepless as long as we abide in the Vine, our Savior and Lord and protective shepherd, Yashuah Jesus. Each day, we are refreshed by His rivers of living water and each new day bring new mercies.

That is good news to me and hopefully always for you too!  That[s why The Gospel of Yashuah Jesus is the good news,. Prisoners are set free…from fear, depression, poverty, witchcraft, pornography, obesity and many other generational strongholds. Luke 4:8. Brother or sister, have you received Jesus’ freedom?

It is time to embrace the revelation of Father’s covenenat promises. and it won’t be by  amassing much knowledge and studying.   Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. 2The one who thinks he knows something does not yet know as he ought to know.… 1 Cor  :1

Paul elaborates in the first and second chapters of Colossians that mystery of the Gentiles is…Christ in you. Imagine that! In Yashuah Jesus,  all the fullness of glory, dominion and honor  exists and Father Jehovah has adopted us into that kingly-Priestly heritage. Here is where Paul urges us to walk  worthy in the Lord. How do we walk worthy? Col. 1:10.  1 Peter 2:9 ,  Tells us we are now  a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.! This is tremendously exciting news to me.

We now adopted into a royal heritage a holy inheritance through Yashauh Jesus. let us no longer call ourselves wretched sinners, but a holy Priesthood! It is time to revere the sacrifice and partake of Jesus’ gift to us through His shed blood and broken body. Sadly, many of us have never received the revelation or been taught properly because their pastors walked  in the flesh and did not accept divine wisdom and revelation from Holy Spirit (Ruach HaKodesh because of legalsim and unbelief!  Countless TV pastors and ministries  are not led by Holy Spirit, but their own perceived idea of holiness. ( God will hold accountable these pastor, teachers and Rabbis who don not walk in the Spirit, but in the flesh. sadly, these blind lead the blind and many fall into the ditch or deception an lack.  But rejoice, for . Jesus Himself comforted his disciples. When He left, Father would send a comforter. They would not be left as orphans!

Oh beloved, Father has ordained for us to be so much more than we are at present. When we  abide in the limited  perception and mindsets of the old life, we choose to live as miserable paupers.

This past Saturday night, Pastor jJentezen’s  sermon was about greatness. He said greatness is not being born to a wealthy family, having a great talent or having thousands of Twitter or  Facebook followers. Pastor elaborated on what greatness truly is and that is walking worthy in the Lord. Folks, it is a decisive decision to be excellent in every area of your life! It is very hard work and being meticulous and focused, not living in any old sloppy Agape.

I’m continuing this expository after sitting outdoors under the canopy of the trees in my  back yard. The  beautiful strains of three-part harmonies of the Christian group, Second Chapter of Acts hymn, Oh Sacred Head Now Wounded  wafted through my open windowThe mournful hymn  drew me into the depth of  Christ’s suffering  as he prepared  to strengthen Himself in preparation for His next (and last)  excruciating hours of His life. I started to weep and could imagine  Him, alone  and in fearful trepidation  in the  garden of Gethsemane. Great drops of blood breaking out around His face as he begged  His Father that the cup would pass.And Thank God that it did not pass …for I would not be writing this to you now in great thankfulness for His mercy and grace!

I continued to ponder and my  heart began grow very heavy.. Thoughts came about how our nation had sunk to such depraved depths and I  whispered, “I’m so sorry Father for my sins, for our sins. Please forgive us and heal our nation”. I thought about the sex-trafficking trade and  even thought about the breaches that came from our broken covenants and relationships and even from as far back as our  forefathers. How many of us learned from our history books as young student about the plight of the Native Americans. Their portrayal was that they were  half-naked savages deserving to be conquered, humiliated, removed from their ancient land and eventually,  annihilated. . My sorrow deepened and I now understood why our intercessor leader, (so moved by Holy Spirit) had us all repent with her on our conference line for two weeks. I began to get a deep revelation of why America was losing her glorious position fast. Deep repentance, by the whole  body of Christ,  will be the only thing  that will stop God from decimating the whole nation in judgement..

I’m getting deep here folks. We have not walked as kings and priests at all, but have been as sloppy and careless as the common folk and worse than that! We may not have transgressed by the awful sins, but we haven’t opposed evil and the injustice of genocide  Rather, we have  cowered like cowards, to lazy to lift up our holy shield of faith! We see that in the last days evil will proliferate and  so mcuh so, even in God’s church.

Paul told Timothy,  But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— having a form of godliness but denying its power. 2 tim 3 1-5

On the bright side, I’m so grateful for this newly acquired gift of deep repentance gleaned from the  broken prayers of those intercessors I join with every night from 7 to 9 PM. In my 33 years of serving the Lord, repentance has rarely been mentioned. Today, Holy Spirit reminded me deeply that repentance is the first step in healing and there will be no reconciliation  in our lives regarding our broken relationships and/or covenants with each other. Broken covenants proliferate amongst God’s people.. Marriages are held together by a bare thread and the kids are rebellious and disrespectful to their parents. Personal boundaries are trample without the blink of an eye..

Early in this expository, I mentioned how Kings search out a matter. True greatness is pondering a problem and seeking God with all our hearts to resolve the issue and bring about a righteous end. Truly, all of us, if we search deeply enough, will find we’ve missed many areas. We must start to analyze our ways, repent and turn around.  saying I’m sorry  continuously without changing only perpetuates  a damaged area. Christ has called us to be transformed by His Spirit and to apply His  righteous principles to our lives and relationships. We callously disrepect  and dishonor each other by not listen em pathetically and so we wonder why we have no joy. We wonder why we are not prospering as 3 John tells us. We are covenant breakers and many of us do not understand the degree of righteousness and love we need to walk in to abide in the vine!

Diligence is an attribute stressed on the book of Proverbs  Faithfully and persistently honing our character is a sign of greatness. When we ask Holy Spirit continually to Tweak Me, we are seeking to be conformed to His image. We are building excellently on His holy House, which is our breathers and sisters. We must have a conviction to understand the urgency of working hard to keep the unity of the brethren.This is not always easy and many of us have unrequited relationships we should ask God to heap us heal. God’s word tell us to honor each other whether they be the unborn,   military veterans suffering from PTS, the homeless, a family member struggling with a brain-emotional issue, or the elderly neighbor suffering from  dementia.

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If we examine Romans 1 28-31, most of us could admit one or several sins taint our love walks. We need to repent of and ask Father for continual cleaning. This is the type of repentance God seeks in His children. His will is for us to rise to the level of  kingly-priestly righteousness. We are to lift up holy hand and a holy, pure heart.  May we diligently search out every matter, especially our hearts…towards our Lord and then to our brethren. Only then, can we walk like a King or Queen.

Heavenly Abba Father, help us to humble ourselves under Your mighty hand. Let us be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to be angry James  1 19&20. . Help us to diligently seek out the depth of an issue, the depth of a person and the depth to which you can heal and reconcile us. Holy Spirit, help us to build bridges and not walls in our relationships with each other. Give us strength to be long-suffering and empathetic.  Most of all, help us, to  be very careful how we build upon your house.and may we choose to build with priceless materials of gold, silver and precious stones, (which are the fruits of the Spirit,  Gal 5 22&23).   In Yashuah Jesus’ matchless name, amen.

OCEAN GROVE GOSPEL Summer Boardwalk Concert





3 PM

Leading Worship at Ocean Grove Summer Concert Series with my Taylor

Songwriter-Producer, inspirational speaker, journalist, life coach,
impassioned health advocate, fashion maven-designer, Jazz Diva,
artist/photographer, and worship leader-ordained minister, Anita Ivette Ferrer,
is a consummate professional, giving her very best to everyone she meets.
Though life has thrown many curve balls, ( Lyme Disease, Domestic violence,
child abuse and the past 9 years, TMJ- Dystonia), Anita channels her
victorious energy to write books, record her albums, photograph and share the beauty that has moved her , perform her music and most of all, encouraging and helping  those who’ve fallen in their lives.


Provides emergency Food packages for challenged individual or families

Provides bedside visitation and prayer for terminally ill

Provides  inspirational  Christian material, (books, DVDS, CDS) for discipleship

Provides edifying and counseling for new and young Christian believers

Provides Music. speaking and educational outreaches to churches, schools and correctional-maximum security facilities

Provides entertainment & visitation for nursing home & assistant living centers

Teaching beginning to advanced voice and beginning to intermediate guitar to children and adults

Brave Flame was incepted in 1992

Anita Ivette Ferrer and her husband, Mark depend on faithful partners to support the great needs of the   Monmouth, Ocean and Burlington County areas. We covet your financial gifts and prayers.  Anita’s exquisite hand-beaded necklaces, chokers, bracelets and ankle bracelets will be avail for sale at her concerts. You’ll find something special for that lady of any age in your life.  Anita also has her wonderful music CDs

DSCN2164Ministering to the elderly

DSCN2555Ocean Grove, Anita with band 2014

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SUPPORT, Anita’s ministry by buying her beautiful hand-beaded jewelry universal rehab gig long branch nj 2010Performing for the wheelchair population UNIVERSAL REHABILITATION, Livingston, NJ

hospital vistation

Pee-Wee loves to minister!

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Apologizing the right way makes all the difference in a friendship. - JGI/Jamie Grill/Getty Images
Teaching Sunday August, 2016

As no time before in these turbulent and uncertain times has there ever been such an urgent need for productive and Godly communication…that discourse which builds bridges of courage (to weather the impending global events and prophecies) and hope, (that those who put all their trust in Jehovah and Yashuah Jesus. shall abide in safety and provision).

Communication blares everywhere, like a neon  light in the night, begging to be noticed.  New reporters and journalists vie for our attention and we are bombarded with reports via internet broadcasting, newspapers and word of mouth. The Bible says that knowledge will increase and indeed, information on just about everything can be taken from GOOGLE. Dan 12:4 4″But as for you, Daniel, conceal these words and seal up the book until the end of time; many will go back and forth, and knowledge will increase.”
One thing is sadly true, though, despite all the massive amount of information, mankind has not became smarter, but more hard-heated and arrogant.

The Bible has much to say about our words, (and even the intents of what we would say, but don’t). Jesus was not gentle when he confronted the hypocritical Pharisees. He blasted them and rightly so. Here is a case where He was angry, but He sinned not. Matthew 12:34N 34 Brood of vipers! How can you, being evil, speak good things? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. By the way there is a right time and righteous reason to be angry as long as you do not condemn or intend harm.


Those who are most fruitful in his/her Love walk and who greatly builds up the kingdom of God are those who are patient listeners, not just with their ears…but with their hearts. And they are longing for reconciliation

Ja. 1:19 19My beloved brothers, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, Leading worshipslow to speak, and slow to anger, 20for man’s anger does not bring about the righteousness that God desires.…

If Jehovah, the Creator of the Universe can beckon Isaiah to come and talk with him, why should not every one of us eagerly seek to talk, reason and be reconciled in peace with our brother or sister. There is a deep anchor of pride within us that craves the  possibility that our option or perspective is more valuable than our brethren s. This is called being arrogant or puffed up in our own wisdom. I’ve seen discord, misunderstanding and severed friendships  so often and by all kinds of people.  Some beautiful and long-time friendships ended because of pride and the refusal to listen with an open heart.

Can we just find a nice cafe or order a pizza and sit down at the table with the desire to be reconciled again? Well, it’s not going to  happen if one or both of us refuse to be humble, listen and discuss issues of difference. Stories abound where congregations divided because of sharp disagreement with their pastors. Very sad and how Father yearns that His children live together in peace. Peace and reconciliation are the things most needed in Father’s house.

As a communicator, I am passionate to see marriages, families, neighborhood, cities and nations resolve their differences thru telling the truth in love. This seems to be an impossibility in light of the nature of  people caught up in their own small whirlwind world.   We can visit YouTube any day and see countless examples of angry, seething crowds and groups at enmity with each other. Even brother and sisters in Christ  disagree about  Donald Trump and the candidates. And debates prevail regarding everything from the refugees, our borders, Christian genocide and Transgenderism.

How do we navigate the vicious maze of heated debate in a matter which would be gracious and illuminating? We American Christian are indeed facing the most challenging time in history and the lack of truth, righteous conversation, strategy and prayer are the missing ingredients to tackling the job at hand..making sense of. life and our nation’s future. The good new is…With God all things are possible, even the healing of our nation.

I’ve heard two prominent pastors confirm the need for wise strategy, and and intercessory prayer in the context of a reasonable round-table discussion. The barriers to solutions of our great problems are differences in perspective, religious backgrounds and ethnicity. .

In studying more in depth Spiritual warfare, I learned  that lack of truthful communication lends itself to resistant strongholds of the mind.

One of the most spiritually reputable Pastors whom I highly respect, the late Pastor Derrik Prince, discussed in detail three areas where there was a barrier to godly communication. In chapter thirteen of his book Pulling Down Strongholds, Pastor Derrick discusses areas which block freedom of righteous thinking. These three areas he calls modern high places, are

  1. The basis of nationality

Yashuah Jesus there is no nationality or gender. There is no Greek or Jew, Master nor slave, Male nor female. We are all equal, yet there are still denominations or sects which believe females are not allowed to preach or teach or have any area of leadership.

2. The Basis of a particular  Doctrine

Many people who are devout Catholic refuse to even consider the concept of being born-again or the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and   idolize Mary and the saints. Some Christian sect want nothing to do with anything related to prophecy or even  the existence of demons.

3. The Basis of Loyalty to a specific Leader

Some people will listen only to pastors or teachers whose doctrine they follow.  Their minds are completely abhorrent to even listen to others  anointed teachers who preach the correct doctrine.

Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. We must continue to declare with our mouths,  God’s word and truth when we hear it preached.not just our hearts God’s truth

King David lived by his Psalm 19:14

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.

May we be like David who pleaded with God  May my prayer be counted as incense before You; The lifting up of my hands as the evening offering. 3Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips. 4Do not incline my heart to any evil thing, To practice deeds of wickedness With men who do iniquity; And do not let me eat of their delicacies.…

Oh,  my we  be ever careful that our words do not decree a curse or block a blessings from anyone. And may our goal be to  refine the way we respond to someone who hasa differing opinion. We would be very wise to watch the company we keep, because God has called us tp peace and harmony. The NIV version of proverbs 22:24 says,

..Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered,







Ministering to elderly and sick nursing homes residents with Pee-Wee.

Note to Readers: My journaling of my battle with Dystonia-TMJ is to bring awareness to friends l loved ones in the hopes of giving more help, compassion and understanding to our deficiencies. I also hope doctors and medical personnel can understand the various areas of our lives that are restricted  and inhibit by inability to administer to our former duties, responsibilities and personal creative endeavors.  These journal entries and (medical personnel involved) . Our symptoms may even affect our judgement and/or mental-emotional prowess before we  had our condition. The utmost patience and compassion is needed for us to be contributors to our father’s kingdom. May our prayers, not just  for Dystonia, Alzheimer, Dementia ( or any other victim of a health disorder,)  not just be for our immediate healing, (so we don’t have to be inconvenienced) but to teach us patience and forbearance.

Journal Entry,  July 5, 2016

Just woke up to another overcast day, promising more rain. I don’t complain because many states are in a water crisis. My vegetable garden is flourishing, but the barometer and humidity has wrecked havoc with my jaw joints. When atmospheric pressure changes,  my neck muscles, nerves and jaws go berserk, making it almost impossible to accomplish any thing with merit. It’s going on two weeks trying to get together two of my best story to send to Guidepost inspirational magazine. I’m also waiting to get motivated to send m art package to a greeting card company here in Paterson, NJ.

Each day is different in this season of TMJ Dystonia in regards to what I’m able to accomplish, but it’s always the same regarding my determination to receive my miracle manifestation of healing. God has still not answered my question regarding what purpose this tormenting condition persists.  At times my flesh reminds me that it’s going on nine years and if God had a great plan for me, how could He be so cruel to allow it to linger and so curtail my vivaciousness and productivity. I remind myself that Abba is a good God and everything He gives is wonderful and needful to His children. One thing I know for sure ..that His ways are perfect and He does know how much I’m suffering. Satan’s plan is always to ambush our minds and barrage us with a continual spray of doubting questions, physical pain and our focus of it.

At times when I have a moment of peace, such as when I’m pulling acorn seedlings in my yard, I feel His gentle presence. Oddly, my muscles rest and my jaw is calm. My jaw and throat also seem to get calmer while I’m focusing on my fine bead work. But mostly, I’m groaning in agony as I press forward, (much like pushing through a tropical impenetrable forest),  through each hour to make it to bedtime. Here is where I rely on Father’s strength each day for sanity! When the neck spasms get so bad that I fall on the floor and writhe in pain, I can’t bare to be alive. Here is where I have to take captive that demonic spirit of suicide, death and insanity. I can’t explain to anyone except someone enduring daily pain on a scale of 8 or nine every waking moment of their lives.

After these many years, I deal with  the grief of losing a good chunk of my life. A dark season of nine years is a lot. I know brother Joseph, in the Bible, had to bear thirteen years of incarceration, but having a agonizing and distracting bodily condition is a whole new ball game. The most painful thing for me is deducing my relationship with Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit. I’ve always believed that valid and thriving  relationship with the Lord had to be true and breath-takingly reverent. My prayer times are anything but reverential  There’s a whole lot of shaking and  jerking going on, hardly my idea of anything pleasing to God!  My focused prayer and devotions to Him are at best , sporadic. (I’m just being transparent with you). I often go in to prayer expecting  the outcome to be detached and superficial because  mostly… I weep through the whole time! Whew. Imagine struggling through your talking to father God?

“Father forgive me for being this way.”

Maybe tomorrow, I will have no more spasms and I can joyfully never and praise him. This is the uncharted waters that the Bible doesn’t address, so I have to contend with disgust of my inability to give Father my best and to even give Him His proper due.

The other devastating thing i that doctors I’ve seen have no idea where to even start for a treatment program. They look at me in surprise and apologize that there is nothing they can do. I’ve been researching and GOOGLING for over six years and have  found only a few doctors who specifically treated Dystonia of the mouth and.or upper cervical area. A girl freind  messaged me a few weeks ago telling me she also was researching my condition and found a  Dr LEE, who has a private practice   in South Korea. Many of his  Dystonia and TMJ patients were getting successful results with his treatments!  I also found a doctor  in  DE who treated TMJ. Unfortunately, they are very few and far in between in NJ and to travel to other states like the doctor in Teaas would be very costly and inconvenient for my husband to take off work. I continue to ask and pray whether father wants me to wait for His divine supernatural creative miracle for my jaw or travel to a  TMJ physician. Father be merciful to us who are suffering.

Dr Lee’s practice and You-Tube link.

July 4th was spent praying for a breakthrough rest with my jaw and neck spasms. The day was already almost half over and I needed to express my love for my Heavenly Father. it was so frustrating, picking up my Taylor and just jerking so wildly, I had to lay down. Uselessness and despair threatened to ruin my day, but finally picked up my guitar anyway and started to sing my favorite energetic hymns, like Onward Christian Soldiers.  Anyway, I am more than a conqueror!

Fast forward today, brought my Bible, a Max Lucado devotional and Jewel’s book, Chasing The Dawn into the bedroom. I prayed that something would awaken my heart and I’d be able to move forward into my day. My eyes fell upon the subtitle of Jewel’s book, Melbourne, Australia. I’ve always dreamed of Australia even as a young girl. Down Under seemed a glorious utopia far away from the chaos and heartache of my present circumstance of my parents plan to divorce. I often dreamed in my bed at night that I would somehow end up there and live a peaceful and creative life!

So Jewel expressed the sensations of her entering the stage to perform her repertoire to her Australian fans. Her writing was so elegant and enticing, making me miss my own performing and composing tenure. I felt a profound sense of loss that I was so far and disconnected to that glorious season of my life. Words cannot describe a performance were the performer “feels” her audience and they feel her. It is an indescribable connection that infuses the artists expression of singing-performing (and doctors have no idea the profound effects that a neurological disorder as Dystonia-TMJ can have on the creativity of a talented singer-composer. This has been a major grief, few realize  the extent of loss when a performing artist is unable to perform (and compose)  at the high level she was used to. I feel less than human and disconnected that this condition has so disrupted the  beautiful overflow of expressing my music-soul.

When I perform before an audience, it’s like I gently fall off a trapeze like a leaf  I lose all sense of the present, of time and the faces that gaze at me.  Father placed me in a I  a divine bubble and I’m floating in His love. Everything around me fades into nothingness and all I’m aware of is the holiness  (and lightness0 of His presence. This has happened several times. Twice, when I sang at dying persons’ deathbed and at a funeral service, where a seer told my husband she saw cherubim dancing joyously around me as I sang my Psalm 91 original. Another recent time, was just last month while singing two of my favorite Hymns His Eye is on the Sparrow and It Is Well at a church concert. . Despite the fact I was miserable and my neck was inflamed with pain and my mouth was  moving violently, I grabbed Father’s hand and took His strength. No one could have been more surprised than me, when everyone stood up and joined me on the heart-rending chorus, It is Well With My Soul. I knew it was God and God alone who carried me through the song.

10-17-2012-205THE VOICE of an ANGEL

A girl, her voice and Guitar, Proclaiming the Love of Christ!

This dark season I’m immersed in is complicated, daunting and bizarre with its untold repercussions. I can’t bare to be seen in public because of the embarrassing facial grimaces and my arms and upper shoulder jerking. Even standing in line at the post office for fifteen minutes is main achievement. With these negative symptoms molding me into something no one would want to be, I’ve learned to make some adjustments. I’ve long discarded the activity of complaining and have made a lovely habit of making someone’s day a little better. If I’m at the grocery store I find something attractive about the person near me and compliment them. I so delights me to see them smile and to make their day by a compliment. The practice of being a blessing to someone is a high point of my day. I refuse to give the enemy any ground or make him think that his attacks on me will sully God’s wonderful destiny for me. I want to please my Father by serving and being a blessing no matter how hard it is! I feel sad for mean people because I know that they’ve not practiced and seen the results of kindness in spite of their physical misery, stressful relationship or mundane life. Persistent acts of kindness and serving cheerfully is evidence of a God-infused lifestyle.
All this being said, I’m reminded of President Abraham Lincoln, One of the greatest presidents who ever lived, who endured and succeeded despite countless failures and  disappointments, shut doors and heart-aches. Amazingly, he grabbed the bull by the horn  in all his tenacity and audacity…his faith in God almighty.  He prevailed, head held high even during one of America’s most horrific times, the Civil War. Though I’m not faced with anarchy, riots and the threat of assassination, I still am facing a mountain which shall be moved by my obstinate faith in the God who restores and rewards all things.

Weathering Dystonia,  (as president Lincoln faced his own giants) I know that God must have a very important job for me to do in the future and He is preparing and training me for such a time as this. Thankfully, July 5, 20016, we are still in peace here in America and life is somewhat normal. I recently watched a Christian outreach organization,  Ezra International outreach who focused their relief efforts on the refugees from cities near Ukraine. Soldiers had all but demolishes the businesses, neighborhoods and banks by bombs and machine gun fire. I couldn’t believe my eyes as I gazed at the footage of such devastation. Thousands were killed, there were bodies in the streets and many holocaust survivors were starving and left on their own. America could soon be enduring the same fate and I prayed that God would be merciful to the sick, elderly and young ones. Any of us American citizens could suddenly face the terrible war atrocities as our brethren in war-torn Ukraine and any other middle eastern city!

So… it would behoove me…and everyone to thank God that our country is still somewhat intact and not facing the atrocities and hardships of war and judgment.  Maybe for a short time, we are still the land of the free and though my own personal suffering is challenging, t’s nowhere near the suffering of people who’ve had their homes destroyed by bombs and have no where to go to get their next meal.

Dystonia reminds me of the need to be more compassionate, empathetic and giving of my resources to those who have less. Though I’d never wish anyone to endure a condition that robs and diminishes so much of our lives, the blessing in disguise is the  awareness and empathy of others sufferings and the motivation to do something about it!

Perhaps that is the gift Father looks to glean when we face a loss or bodily suffering. May father use you and I greatly to strengthen someone who has a deformity, impediment of disability


angel in  copper silk gown1“Lord, help me get through this. Help me, please” I kept saying as my jaw and mouth started to throb and convulse. I boldly accepted my pastor’s invitation to perform at the Jackson Baptist glory Celebration, a musical worship concert of local worship leaders and teams. A week ago, I emailed Pastor Sandra that I’d be performing His Eye is on the Sparrow and It is Well, two of my favorites that I sang to the residents of my area nursing home and the local physical rehabilitation centers. Those two songs were staples because they were a reminder of God’s promise to me that He was with me even in the valley. I had to play these two songs on my guitar almost everyday, just to remind myself that indeed, despite the incessant, tormenting pulling in my neck, the jerking of my arms and the rapid opening and closing of my mouth, one day, I would be released. It took every ounce of focus to do anything of substance. During this TMJ-Dystonia tenure, I’d programmed myself to call upon the Lord to strengthen me.. Steadfast confidence and reliance on Him was always the reward. That was who Father was,…always gracious in answering my prayer to give my best to my performances.

As more people entered the church, I could feel the excitement, which propelled me even more to be in close communion with Father. My husband Mark, saw I was in distress and massaged my neck. A girlfriend showed up, excited and encouraging and also gave me a neck massage.
People were filling into the well-lit church while the musicians and singers waited on the platform for the sound engineer to tweak their sound. My turn came and I adjusted the microphone. An older guitarist gentleman told me I could plug my guitar to his box which was a blessing so I didn’t have to set up all my effects pedals. Then I took a back seat near the edge of the church so people wouldn’t see my mouth contort. I hunched over in my seat, trying to take deep breaths to control the violent pulling and spasming in my neck. I felt an anxiety rise up, which always happened when the muscles got inflamed from the continua movement of my jaw. I continued to pray and stay alert .It was getting harder and harder to stay comfortable and I had to fight the impulse to run to the car and lay on my back for relief.

Finally, the concert started with a vivacious acapella trio. I was third in line. Then my Pastor approached the stage and introduced herself and me. I scurried up to the platform, nonchalant about my nondescript and unglamourous appearance. I’d long ago discarded my adherence to looking beautiful and well-coifed because it took so much energy to get through each hour. It had come to the point where it took an enormous amount of focus to do basic chores, my exercise routine, my daily voice scales and guitar practice. My only concern now, was to focus  on my performance-ministering in God’s anointing. To people enduring catastrophic illness, outward, perfect beauty is the last concern. Our symptoms wear us out to the point that we can’t be concerned that our make-up is perfect. Anyway, my lipstick and mascara always smeared or wore off halfway into any activity. My face always ended up leaning on my hands as I tried to position my head and neck in a comfortable way. Such is dealing with an upper cervical-spinal issue. I felt peaceful as I faced the audience.
“I’m so blessed and thankful to be here tonight despite having a very difficult almost nine years struggling with Dystina-TMJ, a neurological disorder similar to Parkinson. I’m so glad to be here to encourage any of you who are stiffening with any kind of illness. No matter who you are, God cares about what you are going through. Indeed, His eye is on the sparrow and as He is attentive to a tiny sparrow falling to the ground, so much more so are you precious in His sight”

The strains of my guitar and voice filled the church and I felt at ease, hardly aware of any muscles neck spasms. It was amazing how relaxed I now felt,compared to the preceding hour of anguish in my neck. I knew it was all Him! At the end of His Eye Is on the Sparrow, I paused for a second.  My eyes swept across the people’s faces as they sat spell bound watching me and listening to my every word. My face softened and I said, “It is well. It is Well.”
I then felt a surge of strength and stated, “You know, no weapon formed against you shall proper and Satan is under your feet. Get a hold of that and decide to walk powerfully in God’s strength. The devil is under your feet!”

JACKSON BAPTIST Church concert June  5, 2016

The audience grabbed a hold of that one and I preceded to sing It is well. I was joyful to hear one of the drummers accompanying me and my performance came alive with God’s hope and victory for everyone who’d choose to believe that all is well because of Christ’s victory on the cross!

By the third verse, everyone was standing and joined in through the end of the song! The chorus…It is well, with my soul reverberated with the layered harmonies of many voices. It was a transcendent moment for me! Father God punctuated His daughter’s glorifying music performance with His healing presence.

As I left the stage with the applause still lingering, the wicked spasms came back with a vengeance and I told Mark and my friend I had to lay down. I rushed to our HHR car and rested, immediately feeling less pressure in my neck. After about a half an hour, I decided to go back in, in case there was anyone who wanted to talk with me or have prayer. I was immediately approaches by several people One tall lady in particular, grabbed my hand.

“Hello sister and what can I pray with you for?”I asked.

“I was so blessed…so blessed by your songs. ” She gushed with tear-filled eyes. ” I have Lupus and have been very depressed for a long time.” She went on to share a little of her story and then a pastor joined me as I prepared to pray over the sister. Quite a few more people approached me to hug me and shake my hand and then I felt weak with the excitement and challenge of the night. I retreated back to the car to rest.

As I meditate and chronicle this pivotal evening of my life, I ponder the mystery of my battle-journey.  This TMJ-Dystonia condition has affected me in so many ways, some bad, but mostly good. Anyone diagnosed with a chronic illness will first ask, “Why me, God?” Then they will become angry at the injustice of it all and then resign themselves, either to resentment-bitterness or they decide that they will fight back and make the best of it! I have chosen to be the victorer and make the best of this daunting trial and trust that father will get all the glory from it!l

My encouragement to anyone enduring a daily or terminal illness is to weight your thoughts, dreams, standards and hopes by God’s word and His living presence. The Bible doesn’t answer all the the Jobian mysteries of a catastrophic health condition. For me it’s been groping my way through a dark maze and then leaving the “out” door onto a terrain riddled with land mines. Failure and death lurks beside every mine and one wrong step could propel you into the cemetery of resignation. I’ve often asked myself why I forge forward in my research, knowledge of Biblical healing and preventative medicine, (natural healing) when I’m daily almost overwhelmed with these devastating muscle-neurological and bio-chemical abnormalities.

I’ve learned from Dr Caroline Leaf (brain scientist) about the utter complexity of how the brain and the nuero-transmitters react to stress and trauma. From her research I’ve gleaned amazing insight on the importance of learning, meditating and relying on God’s divine and superior knowledge. After all, He did create and fashion our bodies in the most unfathomable ways ways!

Coming from a background of extreme abuse (bullying and domestic violence) and suffering much rejection because of generational sins, and then being redeemed  and transformed by Christ’s Yashuha’s love and freedom, reminds me  of my vow to the evil powers that be, that I will never again live in bondage. Though these devastating symptoms threaten me each day to hold me captive, I’ve relied on God’s Holy Spirit to empower me with His all-abiding strength, resilience and the possibility of total healing-restoration! Who else can promise that? Neither doctors, nor the toxic drugs they push can promise the prefect healing of our physician, Christ the messiah whose very stripes enabled us to walk in restoration!

close up anita OG

I, for one, need nothing else, but Him. The irony of my health journey has been that my enemy has tried to silence me by afflicting the very tools of my ministry. A worship leader-psalmist-speaker’s mouth and voice are the instruments with which she/he expounds God’s healing words, promises and anointed presence. Only in God’s presence is healing, so my enemy has chosen to viciously attack me, ( in my neck, vocal chords, throat and jaw) so that he can shut me down and shut off God’s healing works through me!

Ten years ago, somewhat vivacious and passionately aspired to get signed and go on tour, I never would have imagined to join the ranks of the “disabled” population.  Any pride or self-reliance I had is now completely extinguished and I’ve been brought to the place of humble submission…total reliance on Him alone!. This is Father’s refining process for me. I’m on his potters’ wheel and He is shaping me to what he wishes me to be. (Now, I can’t say that I’m always still and yielding) but mostly, I trust that He knows what He is doing.

He is using a chosen instrument, not of my parents ilk. None of my parents were musicians, nether were any composers or played instruments! It has been a testimony for God to teach me how to play guitar and compose the beautiful Psalms he has given me. It will be seven years since beginning the recording of my album MOD PROPHET and then my worship CD,  The Anointing, His Presence. They are nearing completion, getting more polished and glorious with each song. I will not stop and neither shall my enemy stop my mouth from praising Him and teaching the world of His great promises and Love.

The songbird will sing!


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