SILENCING the SONGBIRD


angel in  copper silk gown1“Lord, help me get through this. Help me, please” I kept saying as my jaw and mouth started to throb and convulse. I boldly accepted my pastor’s invitation to perform at the Jackson Baptist glory Celebration, a musical worship concert of local worship leaders and teams. A week ago, I emailed Pastor Sandra that I’d be performing His Eye is on the Sparrow and It is Well, two of my favorites that I sang to the residents of my area nursing home and the local physical rehabilitation centers. Those two songs were staples because they were a reminder of God’s promise to me that He was with me even in the valley. I had to play these two songs on my guitar almost everyday, just to remind myself that indeed, despite the incessant, tormenting pulling in my neck, the jerking of my arms and the rapid opening and closing of my mouth, one day, I would be released. It took every ounce of focus to do anything of substance. During this TMJ-Dystonia tenure, I’d programmed myself to call upon the Lord to strengthen me.. Steadfast confidence and reliance on Him was always the reward. That was who Father was,…always gracious in answering my prayer to give my best to my performances.

As more people entered the church, I could feel the excitement, which propelled me even more to be in close communion with Father. My husband Mark, saw I was in distress and massaged my neck. A girlfriend showed up, excited and encouraging and also gave me a neck massage.
People were filling into the well-lit church while the musicians and singers waited on the platform for the sound engineer to tweak their sound. My turn came and I adjusted the microphone. An older guitarist gentleman told me I could plug my guitar to his box which was a blessing so I didn’t have to set up all my effects pedals. Then I took a back seat near the edge of the church so people wouldn’t see my mouth contort. I hunched over in my seat, trying to take deep breaths to control the violent pulling and spasming in my neck. I felt an anxiety rise up, which always happened when the muscles got inflamed from the continua movement of my jaw. I continued to pray and stay alert .It was getting harder and harder to stay comfortable and I had to fight the impulse to run to the car and lay on my back for relief.

Finally, the concert started with a vivacious acapella trio. I was third in line. Then my Pastor approached the stage and introduced herself and me. I scurried up to the platform, nonchalant about my nondescript and unglamourous appearance. I’d long ago discarded my adherence to looking beautiful and well-coifed because it took so much energy to get through each hour. It had come to the point where it took an enormous amount of focus to do basic chores, my exercise routine, my daily voice scales and guitar practice. My only concern now, was to focus  on my performance-ministering in God’s anointing. To people enduring catastrophic illness, outward, perfect beauty is the last concern. Our symptoms wear us out to the point that we can’t be concerned that our make-up is perfect. Anyway, my lipstick and mascara always smeared or wore off halfway into any activity. My face always ended up leaning on my hands as I tried to position my head and neck in a comfortable way. Such is dealing with an upper cervical-spinal issue. I felt peaceful as I faced the audience.
“I’m so blessed and thankful to be here tonight despite having a very difficult almost nine years struggling with Dystina-TMJ, a neurological disorder similar to Parkinson. I’m so glad to be here to encourage any of you who are stiffening with any kind of illness. No matter who you are, God cares about what you are going through. Indeed, His eye is on the sparrow and as He is attentive to a tiny sparrow falling to the ground, so much more so are you precious in His sight”

The strains of my guitar and voice filled the church and I felt at ease, hardly aware of any muscles neck spasms. It was amazing how relaxed I now felt,compared to the preceding hour of anguish in my neck. I knew it was all Him! At the end of His Eye Is on the Sparrow, I paused for a second.  My eyes swept across the people’s faces as they sat spell bound watching me and listening to my every word. My face softened and I said, “It is well. It is Well.”
I then felt a surge of strength and stated, “You know, no weapon formed against you shall proper and Satan is under your feet. Get a hold of that and decide to walk powerfully in God’s strength. The devil is under your feet!”

JACKSON BAPTIST Church concert June  5, 2016

The audience grabbed a hold of that one and I preceded to sing It is well. I was joyful to hear one of the drummers accompanying me and my performance came alive with God’s hope and victory for everyone who’d choose to believe that all is well because of Christ’s victory on the cross!

By the third verse, everyone was standing and joined in through the end of the song! The chorus…It is well, with my soul reverberated with the layered harmonies of many voices. It was a transcendent moment for me! Father God punctuated His daughter’s glorifying music performance with His healing presence.

As I left the stage with the applause still lingering, the wicked spasms came back with a vengeance and I told Mark and my friend I had to lay down. I rushed to our HHR car and rested, immediately feeling less pressure in my neck. After about a half an hour, I decided to go back in, in case there was anyone who wanted to talk with me or have prayer. I was immediately approaches by several people One tall lady in particular, grabbed my hand.

“Hello sister and what can I pray with you for?”I asked.

“I was so blessed…so blessed by your songs. ” She gushed with tear-filled eyes. ” I have Lupus and have been very depressed for a long time.” She went on to share a little of her story and then a pastor joined me as I prepared to pray over the sister. Quite a few more people approached me to hug me and shake my hand and then I felt weak with the excitement and challenge of the night. I retreated back to the car to rest.

As I meditate and chronicle this pivotal evening of my life, I ponder the mystery of my battle-journey.  This TMJ-Dystonia condition has affected me in so many ways, some bad, but mostly good. Anyone diagnosed with a chronic illness will first ask, “Why me, God?” Then they will become angry at the injustice of it all and then resign themselves, either to resentment-bitterness or they decide that they will fight back and make the best of it! I have chosen to be the victorer and make the best of this daunting trial and trust that father will get all the glory from it!l

My encouragement to anyone enduring a daily or terminal illness is to weight your thoughts, dreams, standards and hopes by God’s word and His living presence. The Bible doesn’t answer all the the Jobian mysteries of a catastrophic health condition. For me it’s been groping my way through a dark maze and then leaving the “out” door onto a terrain riddled with land mines. Failure and death lurks beside every mine and one wrong step could propel you into the cemetery of resignation. I’ve often asked myself why I forge forward in my research, knowledge of Biblical healing and preventative medicine, (natural healing) when I’m daily almost overwhelmed with these devastating muscle-neurological and bio-chemical abnormalities.

I’ve learned from Dr Caroline Leaf (brain scientist) about the utter complexity of how the brain and the nuero-transmitters react to stress and trauma. From her research I’ve gleaned amazing insight on the importance of learning, meditating and relying on God’s divine and superior knowledge. After all, He did create and fashion our bodies in the most unfathomable ways ways!

Coming from a background of extreme abuse (bullying and domestic violence) and suffering much rejection because of generational sins, and then being redeemed  and transformed by Christ’s Yashuha’s love and freedom, reminds me  of my vow to the evil powers that be, that I will never again live in bondage. Though these devastating symptoms threaten me each day to hold me captive, I’ve relied on God’s Holy Spirit to empower me with His all-abiding strength, resilience and the possibility of total healing-restoration! Who else can promise that? Neither doctors, nor the toxic drugs they push can promise the prefect healing of our physician, Christ the messiah whose very stripes enabled us to walk in restoration!

close up anita OG

I, for one, need nothing else, but Him. The irony of my health journey has been that my enemy has tried to silence me by afflicting the very tools of my ministry. A worship leader-psalmist-speaker’s mouth and voice are the instruments with which she/he expounds God’s healing words, promises and anointed presence. Only in God’s presence is healing, so my enemy has chosen to viciously attack me, ( in my neck, vocal chords, throat and jaw) so that he can shut me down and shut off God’s healing works through me!

Ten years ago, somewhat vivacious and passionately aspired to get signed and go on tour, I never would have imagined to join the ranks of the “disabled” population.  Any pride or self-reliance I had is now completely extinguished and I’ve been brought to the place of humble submission…total reliance on Him alone!. This is Father’s refining process for me. I’m on his potters’ wheel and He is shaping me to what he wishes me to be. (Now, I can’t say that I’m always still and yielding) but mostly, I trust that He knows what He is doing.

He is using a chosen instrument, not of my parents ilk. None of my parents were musicians, nether were any composers or played instruments! It has been a testimony for God to teach me how to play guitar and compose the beautiful Psalms he has given me. It will be seven years since beginning the recording of my album MOD PROPHET and then my worship CD,  The Anointing, His Presence. They are nearing completion, getting more polished and glorious with each song. I will not stop and neither shall my enemy stop my mouth from praising Him and teaching the world of His great promises and Love.

The songbird will sing!

 

By His Stripes… You are Healed


My Dystonia Journey

Note: If you are suffering from Dystonia, Parkinson, MS, Lupus, Fibromyalgia or any of the host of neurological disorders, please have an open heart, research. Please don’t allow drugs to diminish the quality fo your life. Pain is a killer, yes, but Christ is Life. I have no words to convince you to seek passionately and incessantly for the root issue your illness.  If anything…after eight long, tormenting years of suffering agonizing pain and humiliation, God is our only answer and cure! BTW, still can’t find a cure? Look into spiritual Christian deliverance. According to pastor Henry Wright strongholds and generational issues could be the root of you not receiving your healing. This is all so complicated, but at Pastor Wrights Healing    seminars we learned that small insidious sins such as unforgiveness, bitterness, resentments and even innocent emotions such as deep grieving can block us from healing. Deliverance sessions with a empathetic and  Holy-Spirit-filled counselor can release your ability to receive Jesus healing! check out Henry Wright on Sid Roth. His book,  A More Excellent Way, Be In Health, is a life changer.God bless you on your healing journey. Please pass this blog on to any of your loved ones or family members who are sick. This blog may change your life forever

Journal Entry, April 3, 2016 4:50 pm

So, It’s just a little past spring and I’m delighting in the glorious  blooming of my favorite “snow-busters” crocuses. I really had expected that I would be outside brisk-walking and getting back my size four shape. The violent muscle-pulling of my neck  kept me house bound and stuck sitting most of the winter day,  fashioning my beaded chokers. Stringing the beads were just about the only therapy which kept the violent mouth-jaw-tongue and neck spasms from sending me to a nervous breakdown. Of course, my reliance has been and continues to be on my heavenly Father giving me strength and declaring my healing scriptures otherwise, I would be toast!

Mark and I continue to research and scour the internet for any treatment or new breakthroughs in Dystonia, neurological disorders or tremors. We’re researching the treatment protocol to address the mold contamination situation which started in our old home. A Christian sister prayed with me one day last year and insisted I check into the possibility that it was contributing to the Dystonia symptoms and mild seizures. She said the myco-toxins were dangerous and I shouldn’t wait to let myself get sicker.   I trusted her spiritual wisdom and insight, but Mark wasn’t sure that could be the issue, and besides  the tests to find out about mold are very hard to come by. Any doctors who did treat mold were in very exclusive areas and charged at least a grand just to get in the door. After finding out about the cost, Mark got disgusted and gave up…and I continued to get worse!

Even thought, just getting through each hour was arduous and exhausting, my empathy and compassion for those enduring devastating, chronic and unexplained sickness grew. I ‘m more passionate than ever to help others find healing and wholeness.

So many things encapsulate a movement disorder condition.  Besides, the loneliness, isolation and people unable to care and/or empathize with  the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual ramifications of Dystonia, FibroMyalgia, Parkinson’s Lupus or MS, there is the frustration and hopelessness of never  leaving the bodily prison. Worse yet, are the consequences of being addicted to pain-killers and other anti-confirmatory drugs.

I hope the following conversation I had with a freind educates other sufferers of immune and/or nerve disorders. The name is changed  for privacy

Damaris:

I just hate to see u in pain. Aside from lethargy and sluggishness, which I know all too well from my meds, do the meds help w tremors
Do u have trouble eating or swallowing. Is that how u keep your youthful, zero fat shape.
Me:

BTW, just to add, I’m waiting to get my book ready for publication. Editing takes great segacity. Excelling at my craft for the Lord far exceeds the issue of NOT being in pain. Choosing to stay alert, (Mark has great immune system challenges also) & I have to be on top of everything regrading knowledge of immune-enhancing supplements, herbs and especially keeping up with label reading,, a new priority since this evil government seeks to weaken the population thru vaccinations , GMO and our produce being tainted. Not to even elaborate on the toxicity of Splenda, Sucralose, MSG and high fructose corn syrup now being added to most foods and beverages. HFC makes makes people even fatter..Daily exercise is also a priority for me. I need to keep fit because Mark’s back has severe herniated disks and he couldn’t do any taxing physical work like chopping the wood or a lot of snow shoveling. I’m adamant about fitness and there’s the necessity of being so in case of any impenitent  EMP situation. God help those who are overweight  or physically debilitated in anyway!  You know, I would have had cancer also if  it not were for my Biblical declaration of Healing scriptures and researching everything I can about keeping my body cancer-free.
Regarding drugs for tremors, Sinemet and other muscle relaxers do little to get to the root of the  spasms. And besides, I don’t have a Parkinson or tremor problem. I have a nerve spasm issue from pinched nerves from the TMJ ligament and trying to detoxify my body from a past severe Carbon monoxide poisoning which did a number on my body.
Damaris: Any Dr mention wiring jaw wiring for what?
Damaris,  miracles abound for people getting astounding healing from Jesus, our Divine healer. Doctors know almost nothing about the body & how God created it to heal itself! I watch the 700 club, Copelend, Andrew Wommack ministries and many evangelical outreaches, German evangelist Rinehard Bonnke have prayed for miracles all over the world, especially in third-world nations. I’ve heard of testimonies on the Sid Roth Program of people whose limbs restored. Others had eyes restored where their eye sockets were empty. God created new eyes! Others gave testimonies of God giving them brand new organs like lungs, a new heart and  kidneys.
So, Mark and I don’t put too much trust in most mortal doctors who  are revered almost as gods. Mark insists they practice medicine.  Most of them could care less to passionately research new holistic and natural healing modalities. They’d not get their extra thousands from the kickback drug companies give them! Most of them are charlatans who rob poor working-class people and their greed compels them to aspire to  another Lamborghini. Remember, the drug industry is a billion dollar industry.
The Bible frowns on drugs and the overuse and dependence on them is overrated.  Drug are not conducive in any way to healing and wholeness of the body or mind and God’s people should not be so gullible and foolish to fall under the temptation to depend on them. (In rare cases, God may allow them  to stabilize a severe health issue, like blood pressure or high  blood sugar),  but we should all approach drugs with great caution and  education about side effects. they may be used We should seek the counsel and wisdom of Holy Spirit for everything and most particularly, our health and well-being.
.
In Galatian 5:20,
pharmakeia: the use of medicine, drugs or spells

Original Word: φαρμακεία, ας, ἡ
Part of Speech: Noun, Feminine
Transliteration: pharmakeia
Phonetic Spelling: (far-mak-i’-ah)
Short Definition: magic, sorcery, enchantment
Definition: magic, sorcery, enchantment.

Most of the time the drugs have more side effects than the condition itself. Sadly, many people don’t care to do their research for natural cures, (or prevention in the first place). Why aren’t physicians teaching patients how to prevent sickness? 
God’s people should ask the question and ponder the manner in which our precious healer, Jesus Yashuah suffered and bore the lashes on his back and body so we could walk in divine healing! His bruising was beyond our comprehension and manuscripts have yet to describe to true  totality of his battered body for our healing and benefit God’s children are already healed and we have the authority to be healed in His name This is another reason I walk with and serve my Lord, so what doctors offer is of little worth or help. Mark and I will have to continue to seek a Holy Spirit-filled doctor who is in touch with Christ and has the right diagnostic equipment to pinpoint  the root cause of this Dystonia.
I’m thankful for my Facebook sister with the gift of discernment who originally pointed me in a good direction. Mold poisoning , (Myco-Toxins)  often mimic neurological disorders, so besides sharing my other blogs about possible causes, I pray this one will help also.

A DAY in the LIFE of DYSTONIA, (Eight Years)


Eight years and counting…but trusting and believing that I am HEALED by Jesus stripes. I refuse to disbelieve that Christ also endured  the beating for Dystonia, Lupus, ALS  and PSP. These are all satanic attacks and I continue to declare my healing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCo82bv5lRM

Dear Jim, my dear precious man, My heart goes OUT to you also. I’m a lovely gal whose life has been severely humbled and humiliated also. My struggle with mouth, tongue and throat Dystonia has been a living hell every waking moment. Others couldn’t imagine the heartbreak and anguish having to deal with CERVICAL issues which affect almost every area of our body’s and even the organs and brain neurotransmitter activity. Doctors DO NOT care about doing deeper studies on Dystonia because thy get their kickbacks from the DRUG companies. I for one CANNOT take drugs because my calling as an artist, worship leader, composer and journalist depends on my mind being high mental acuity. So my choice is suffering from great pain from a misaligned JAW joint (TMJ) to bitten my tongue til it bleeds and my lower face and mouth making the ugliest grimaces. For a woman, this is demeaning…so I’m housebound almost all of the week. the only time I get out is when I drive myself to my Chriro for my adjustment which does nothing to stop the facial movements. Driving is grueling because my nervous system reacts violently to the engine power, so my mouth goes Berserk!

This next video is about Sara’s battle with Dystonia (TMJ disorder) She’s another hero of mine and her symptoms are very similiar of what my body has suffered. Following is a list of her symptoms.  I highly recommend anyone enduring Dystonia to get a good MRI of your jaw area to see if your misaligned tooth bite is the problem. I tore my jaw ligament while singing a high E note while singing. I heard  something that sounded like a crack or tear and a week later, my problem started. Unfortunately, doctors and neurologists focused on the brain area and spine, but did NOT focus on the  jaw area:) Also consider any head trauma or car accidents . I pray my blog will open up some more areas for you to find relief for your Dystonia.

The following are Sara’s symptom

Secondary/Acquired Paroxysmal Dystonia moving to Generalised Dystonia, Dystonic Storms, Tremor, Teeth clenching, Migraines
Jaw pain, Temple pain left side, Neck Pain, Back Pain, Shoulder Pain, Low back pain, Headaches, Faint/Lightheaded, Concentration issues, Occasional stutter/slurring, Vertigo, Memory impairment, Hearing impairment right side, Balance problems, Chronic Fatigue
Visual disturbances, Light sensitivity, Sound sensitivity, Smell sensitivity and lack of smell, Ear ache intermittent, Dulling of hearing, Tinnitus (occasionally), Loss of taste (I was just adding lots of salt and didn’t realise!), Toothache, Breathing difficulties, Sinus issues, Snoring
Difficult to wake up/drowsiness, Weak muscles – especially arms/legs/ unable to easily hold phone or brush hair, Sharp and Chronic hand/finger pain, Fine motor control issues -writing/eating/DIY, Slowed movement/ability to move, Biting back/sides of tongue all the time, Sensitive teeth (sometimes), Raynaud’s Syndrome (cold feet and hands), Knee pain, Hip pain, Upper arm and upper thigh (lymph) pain

 

I give all glory and thanks to the Lord for ANY creative endeavor I attempt to finish, (my recording of my albums and my 5-part series book! the incessant & violent pulling on my neck and thraot muscles DRAINS any motivation out of me, so I’m constantly crying out to Father for strength. I pray that all my beloved ones, thank God everyday for being able to enjoy your relationship with your precious heavenly Father, Jesus & Holy Spirit. You have NO idea how much easier it is to life life hen you’re not in agony every waking moment. Thank Him everyday for your health and mobility. Many are disabled by DYSTONIA or suicidal. I give ALL thanks to my wonderful Father for helping me endure this daily cross.  all and Please be patient and compassionate to those who have disability. It’s twice as hard to KEEP your marbles together! blessings to you all!

 

Here is another young lady suffering from a TMJ disorder.

Liberal Wisdom and Revelation


book open pages

Liberal Wisdom and Revelation
Journal Entry Saturday January 3, 2015

It is Saturday January third 2015…a new year. In March, it will be eight years dealing with the violent Dystonia spasms of my neck and throat. Mark and I have been back from out Missouri trip: attending Pastor Mel Bond’s miracle healing service. I had positive expectations of God’s creative manifestation. Having already read his powerful book on spiritual warfare and watching his You Tube healing videos, I knew him to be a soft-spoken and gracious man, not using hype to expound God’s greatness in healing. Besides the anticipation of meeting Pastor Mel in person, countless thoughts swirled in my mind. The usual, how could I be serving Father for so long and still be in miserable physical  torment despite continually declaring His healing words and taking authority over any negative thought, event or symptom. It was very frustrating to desire more of Holy Spirit and yet still suffering intensely.

Thus my continuing quest to understand the connection between my head knowledge and Father’s divine pathway to healing.

I meditate once again upon the much-read, but never fully revealed first chapter of Ephesians. Each time I reread it, I feel energized and my spirit illuminated. How can one not read the extravagant words without stopping to meditate upon God’s fatherly resplendent love and provision. He has given us every heavenly and earthly blessing to enjoy! What a book brimming with and explaining the nuances of our appointed divine treasures that father God has ordained to us since the beginning of time! I must admit that I have read the book of Ephesians hundreds of times since 1982, (the year of my salvation re-birth) and wonder why, at this late age, it strikes me in such a powerful way, so much so that I want to compose a tract and share it with the world!

Eph. 1: 3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoptions as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself according to the good pleasure of His will.

Just this opening statement in itself brims over with divine  abundance! Chapter seven continues elaborating on Father’s glorious  extravagance. blessings

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins according to the riches of his grace which he made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence, having made known to us the mystery of His will according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself.

The first chapters of Ephesians is the introduction to the entry and adoption into the family of God! What a wonderful destiny to embrace and yet so many of God’s people are suffering in body and/or enduring poverty and need.

God’s people are now living in the great expanse of knowledge, written in Daniel 12:4)  In these present end times the church is also receiving the full brunt of satan’s rage. I ponder the irony of Paul’s declaring of the glorious destiny that every child of God receives once he follows Jesus Christ. God’s people are indeed perishing from lack of knowledge (there are many ways to perish). How can we awake and walk in that glorious destiny unless we are taught the word of God. Handling the word of God. 2 tim 2:15

Live call in Prayer hosted by Pastor Janet Ellsworth.

Each night at 12:30 am, I tune into CTN Christian network program You and Me, hosted by pastor Janet Ellsworth. This amazing woman of God always has an apt word for God’s children and she is always authoritative, yet enthusiastic and compassionate. As the night goes on and many callers share their burdens, I am astounded at how man are tormented with grievous bodily afflictions. Many call for a financial blessing and still many others ask for deliverance and demons to stop harassing them. It looks to me that the majority of God’s people have not received the pre-ordained blessings as cited in Ephesians and that their pastors, bishops, priests and rabbi’s have not taught them the very basics of the Christ life! Truly, it grieves my heart that so many brothers and sisters are greatly suffering. There are requests for healing and restoration of bodies as many are bedridden, house-bound and hospitalized. Surely, satan is  busy deploying his demons to hinder the gospel from going out into the streets by keeping God’s people in bondage. Something is seriously wrong!

We read in the Gospels’ how Jesus traveled from town to town and was deeply grieved at the wandering, suffering throngs that followed him for healing. During those times, people had little defense against demonic attack or possession. We see so many examples of people being enslaved by spirits of infirmity. We read that Jesus groaned in His spirit at the masses of the precious people scattered as lost sheep without a shepherd. He became known and glorified as the gentle healer.

Pastor Janet’s You and Me call in program is greatly needed. She begins the program with scripture and ends by ministering in compassionate prayer. People need to be taught the very basics of living in Christ,  (particularly, spiritual warfare) and to know how to defend themselves against satanic attack and oppression!  Many have no idea how demons got into their homes, attached themselves to their rebellious children or even how a voo-doo curse was placed by a angry, jealous neighbor or co-worker! This is reality. This is what God’s people are enduring. Sadly, many pastors have no idea how to cast out a demon or counsel and release an enslaved brother or sister out of bondage from a generational curse. This is incomprehensible. We must move away from the tepid Methodist and lukewarm, religious circles, because we are at war with a vicious and relentless enemy!

We read in the gospels about Jesus astounding (Exousia) authority! He promised that after He rose from the dead we would also be walking in both Dunimus) and w. Are pastors teaching the flock how to wield heavenly armament? How many Christians even know what dunimus and exousia are in the first place? I just recently heard a powerful teaching by John Paul Jackson. he elaborated on the power and authority we have in Christ. Yet, I see God’s people doing worse than non-believers! Again, I say something is wrong. We may have a testing period where we are struggling financially, but poverty and need should not be a permanent lifestyle, otherwise we’d be unable  to provide for the needs of the orphans, widows and the poor in our circle?

For the new year, pastors , church leaders and elders need to start getting with the program. It is time for the church to walk and abide in the great callings Paul taught in the book of Ephesians. He asks that we obtain the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of God and that our eyes be enlightened about the hope of His calling! Wow, that sounds like divine living. In that kind of living, there is joy unspeakable and full of glory. We are able to endure difficult times and circumstances in full hope that Jesus is always with us, even in the storm! Are God’s people so full of joy that the world sees it and rejoices? Does our joyful countenance make people compelled to taste and see that the Lord is good and invite them to be their Lord and Savior?.

But the church is too busy going on a witch hunt and scrutinizing small matters of personal conviction rather than teaching the glorious and edifying ways of Christ.

We can no longer abide in a place of lack or ignorance regarding achieving the full array of the glorious promises Father wants us to have. He wishes us to be prosperous and in good health. Yes, there will be times of testing when we may have to endure sickness for a while for His glory, in expectation of healing and restoration. There will be times when Father will allow a satanic attack to buffet us (as in Paul’s case when he asked God three times to take away the thorn in his flesh) , but use it as spiritual muscle-building test so Father is glorified.

The church is directed to build up each other in faith, in gifts and in callings. Love and edifying are the chief goals, but next in line is successful spiritual warfare and knowing our adversary the devil is about seeking to destroy. . Love and wisdom must walk hand in hand.

This January begins a fresh year where I’ll enter the next phase of God’s divine destiny, power, wisdom and prosperity. We must not think prosperity is limited to financial wealth, but wholeness in every area). Father invites us to ask Him for wisdom and we must not stop at where we are, but ask Him to continue imbue us with dunamis (dynamite) wisdom and exousia (authoritative) wisdom!

God bless you!

BEAUTIFUL hand-beaded, one-of-a-kind Chokers


fall,2014 136

About Artist,Anita Ivette Ferrer

Anita Ivette Ferrer thought her unexpected health affliction would be short-lived. She didn’t expect to be still struggling over seven years later from Dystonia, a mysterious movement disorder which doctors say has no known cause nor cure. Anita is used to engaging challenging circumstances, but her latest has brought her to the forefront of uncharted territory Faith in Jesus Christ in hand coupled with an iron will propels her to new heights of spiritual self-discovery, supernatural trust in God and ultra creativity.

fall,2014 139

When she wakes up each morning, she inwardly dreads another day coping with the pain and fatigue which could restrict her ability to live a normal life. But as she gets up from her bed, she relies upon Christ to empower her with strength and hope for the day! Her prayers are always answered as she tackles her house chores, outreach to the bedridden, elderly and dying and her creative endeavors.

fall,2014 128 my collection of Beautiful chokers
Quite by accident, Anita found a temporary respite from her violent facial twitching while repairing some old broken beaded chokers. She found that focusing upon the fine beadwork caused the muscles to cease pulling! The next thing she knew, she was spending more and more time at the craft stores purchasing unique, beautiful beads for her new passion!

Anita, 1989 Magna Cum Laude Brookdale Community College graduate whose major studies were in the humanities and social services, never imagined that a condition like Dystonia would lead her back to her childhood talent, designing!

fall,2014 139Anita believes with all her heart that her healing could be just a heart beat away. Though each day continues to be a struggle, God inspires her to keep the momentum going! She has learned through overcoming battle with chronic Lyme Disease, poverty, child abuse and domestic violence that in order to grow, one must re-invent themselves! Though she’s had to greatly curtail her performing and song-writing due to the spasms, her beaded jewelry design has taken her to new levels of exciting creativity and an opportunity to share her craft with the world. She also hopes to educate the public about Dystonia and movement disorders which are increasing. As yet the only treatments for Dystonia are Botox injections and DPS Deep Brain stimulation which Anita feels would not help her symptoms.

Anita resides with her husband and their cats in Browns Mills, NJ. She is also available to minister in music at your church or special event.

close up anita OG

fall,2014 106

 

 

 

 

 

Purchase of Anita’s creations helps her to continue ministering to the elderly, disable and hospice patient. You can find out more about Anita via her http://www.anitaivetteferrer.wordpress.com blogsite

Anita Ivette Ferrer
Anita Ivette Ferrer One of a Kind Designs
Brave Flame Productions & Outreach
Po Box 102, Bradley Beach, NJ 07720
609-893-2397

Prices range from $25 to $70

Christmas special two for one price `

Proceeds to Dystonia research and Brave Flame Productions & Outreach

In the Waiting Room


 

Standing in Faith for Divine Restoration

I’m in the waiting room. It is the same room where Job wrestled with himself and God. This waiting room is a spiritual area where an afflicted and suffering child of God straddles , (and struggles with) the blurred line of complete faith and trepidatious pain.)

In the waiting room, I’m reading the book of cures for all conditions, despite the fact that I dread the fact that I may wake up to yet another day where this stabbing in my Jaw joint will relentless pummel me to the point of sobbing out loud for relief. I may not be scraping erupting boils off my skins with a sharp piece of pottery, but I am fighting thoughts of being in never-never land with my heavenly father, where there will be no more tears or suffering. What keeps me going is the truth that my Redeemer lives.

God has sent me off downhill on the front seat of a racing rail car in to uncharted territory. For those of us dealing with acute chronic pain without medication, I’ve spent years wracking my brain trying to pinpoint the source of my distress. I’ve also exhausted every option of treatment, to no avail and have also been through countless doctors who’ve treated me with every healing modality available.

I stand here, scratching my head, wondering what to do with myself. I follow Jesus with a devoted heart and know of a certainly that Father God is not the giver of this tormenting disease, but my enemy satan who has sent out one or several of his minions to torment me.

I’m pretty much exhausted and disgusted by all the years of driving to doctors and trying this and that with no relief. I wonder every day how other children of God deal with their excruciating pain. I’ve amassed a library of books on deliverance and getting myself free.

I’ve experienced and learned quite a bit since my other Dystonia blogs from several years ago. I hope this latest one will give a little more insight and a little more hope to the hopeless!

Prayer avails much and the more yo know about the specifics of your condition, the more confidently you can pray in full assurance that Yashuah, or healer shall heal or sickness! Always put prayer at the top of your list, asking Father for supernatural wisdom and whether you’ll need to be treated by a good doctor.

First off, here are a few links that yo may want to check into. My issue has been violent twitching of the neck, mouth, tongue and throat areas, particularity the Platysma muscles and Temporo Mandibular Jaw joint, TMJ. I have done all kinds of research to find a way to sooth the pain in that area.

Dystonia of the lower face cold be cased by Trigeminal Neuyraligia

http://neurosurgery.uthscsa.edu/display_patients.php?ps_id=61&pg

You may also want to pray and ask Father if your resistant Lyme or Dystonia could be linked to a spiritual root. My husband and I just finished a week-long stint of powerful teachings on the spiritual roots of Disease. Although I am very acquainted with the scriptures, I was very surprised to learn about how satan can afflict God’s people with disease and sickness through open doorways of sin or generational curses. Many pastors and denominations insist that once we accept Christ as our Savior it’s a done deal. But there are too many Christians who love Christ and are trying to live godly lives who are suffering greatly from the effects of things that happened during their childhood, in early adolescence and even in the womb! I would leave no stone upturned when it comes to walking in total healing and deliverance.

Doctor Henry Wright, founder of BE IN Health teaching ministries and author of his book, says much about sin being a cause of our stubborn and chronic sickness.

http://www.beinhealth.com/public/

Here are some excellent ministries who specialize in deliverance if you find your symptoms are not improving.

Robert Heldler
http://www.amazon.com/Set-Yourself-Free-Deliverance-Manual/dp/0979167809

Pastor Derek Prince

I also highly recommend detoxifying your body as best as you can. Since Lyme is also connected with mercury start today on a dedicated detoxifying regimen. You’ll still have to deal with pain or discomfort but the less toxins, bacteria and fungi you have the more energetic you’ll be.

Doctor sherry Rogers, book “DETOXIFY or DIE”

http://organicconnectmag.com/sherry-rogers-md-god-designed-the-body-to-heal/#.U0cKRlOwXrY

Above all, Dr Jesus is your chief physician, so pray, declare those scriptures and rejoice, even if you’re sobbing in agony! My life has been so complicated, as many of you also have. May we love each other and fervently pray for each other as Jesus commands us and share the secrets of healing and restoration with each other. The world truly knows we are Christian when we love and cherish each other.

Slow But Steady Progress


Journal Entry, October 3, 2013
My Journey recovering from Lyme, Dystonia and heavy-metal, mercury Poisoning

I am redeemed from the curse and by Jesus’ stripes I am healed! This is the truth I hold on to each day as I grasp the Lord for my complete wholeness. I continue to make the many changes needed for my complete restoration. This morning, I wake up, thanking Him and praising Him for all He has done. I learned that God loves to her our praises and we appreciate all He has done for us. God despises complainers and I try my best, in spite of the great pain and discomfort, to endure each day.

Yesterday was a day from hell. My appointment to be fitted for a crown with Dr Elizabeth Piela, my holistic dentist. arrived. I don’t have to worry about more toxins entering my body with dental repairs. Dr Piela is thorough, not only highly knowledgeable, but also compassionate. She listens to me when I share my concerns and we brainstorm together for a solution. Quite unlike an arrogant Lyme Disease doctor in Stockton who rebuked my husband when he asked for confirmation that EDTA was good for mercury/heavy metal poisoning chelation. Such is the reality with most doctors, who are very arrogant regarding patients who are well-educated about their illness or condition.

I awoke to yet another beautiful, warm Indian summer day. My right jaw was still sore from over two and a half hours of being pried open for preparation of my crown. I was in agony and almost broke down in tears as my throat and jaw nerves kept convulsed. I couldn’t believe the procedure was taking so long, but doctor assured me it was necessary for the procedure. She gave me several shots in my gums so I wouldn’t feel the pain. I was glad I called a spiritual mother earlier in the day for prayer and agreement that I would have no horrendous pain afterwards. I thanked Jesus over and over each second we counted down for the mold to harden for my molar crown. Many thoughts flooded my mind as Dr worked on me. I was angry that the enemy had so attacked my body and teeth over the years and that my progress was so slow.

Continuing her work, Dr mentioned that magnetic detox clay did wonders for mercury. I could have slapped myself, because hubby Mark had purchased a supply for me, but I was always so overwhelmed with my protocol that I kept forgetting! I vowed to apply my clay as soon as I got home to speed up the detox process of my jaw, gums and neck.

There were a myriad of issues I had to deal with every day. The pain factor was the greatest, with the Right jaw being almost dislocated. Then I had the anxiety of not knowing when my teeth were going to chomp down on my poor tongue. Most days, both sides of my tongue were riddled with bumps from where the teeth cut through. Those times that the tooth cut deep and I bled profusely. I screamed at the top of my lungs and cried out loud for about ten minutes. I seemed to take forever for the pain to subside. Every time it happened, I asked God. “Why is this body behaving this way? Is there anybody else on earth enduring such a hell where her mouth, teeth and teeth are her worst enemy? And when will this end?”

I faithfully prayed in faith, wept and searched online for testimonies or stories of other Dystonia, Lyme and heavy metal poisoning victims experiences with recovery. I’ve yet to find anyone with these bizarre and tormenting symptoms, making me all the more isolated and disheartened. I could easily deal with the toxicity, but daily dealing with such pain every moment is almost excruciating. If it weren’t for my relationship with my Heavenly father, Jesus and Holy Spirit I surely would have fallen deeply into depression or been committed.

So, after enduring over two and a half hours of my mouth being pried open, Dr Piela fitted my molar with a temporary crown. I felt so weak from the procedure, that I asked Father God for extra help again to drive home.

So this morning, as I wake up to face yet another day, I start weeping, asking for God’s help and seeking to look deep within myself to free up my body, mind and spirit from any toxic residue. My research about mind-body connection continues as I learn from Dr Caroline Leaf how negative thoughts and emotions from the past take deep root in even our subconscious mind! I know as I continue to soul-search search and address old attitudes with the Holy Spirit, I’m getting freer and freer. But, it’s a taxing process. I vow to completely conquer rejection, abuse and trauma issues from my past. I am going upward and moving forward because Christ has paved the way for me to be fully delivered and vibrant!

Despite all this agonizing, “turtle-slow” progress, I declare

“Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”

I’m called to be the poster child of mysterious, undiagnosed and environmental illness being totally healed by the stripes of Jesus Christ. I’m paving the way in the new frontier of illness that may be bio-engineered in nature.

Many questions remain unanswered as I fumble towards total wellness. I know for a certainty that My Heavenly father will never give me more than I can handle. This challenge entails a steadfast trust, faith and action in Him! This battle is not only a physical, but a spiritual where I must be in position to merge all the Biblical truths-promises with the medical-scientific components! This is truly challenging for one who has no mentor to learn from!

This blog-journal entry is quite different and even more specific than any I have ever written, probably because there is so much at stake. We are in such times where many hapless people and children are suffering greatly and where orthodox medicine has failed in it attempts to heal!

Truly, today, this generation desperately needs the most spiritually (Christ-enlightened) holistic healers. Only the pure, refined temperance of the Holy Spirit can completely make whole those with spiritually rooted or bio-engineered illnesses. Christ warns us in Matthew chapter 24 of the hosts of darkness which will come and deceive the nations, doctors and scientists to ensnare and trick the population into thinking they will be healed and free. There is no darkness in Christ at all, for His wisdom is pure. New Age has beguiled us into thinking we are our own healers.

(This blog seems to be writing itself) so, I share this journal entry with parents whose children are suffering from autism, with grown children whose parent is dying from PSP, (another degenerative and incurable movement disorder) and with those who have neurological conditions of which there is no cure or relief. These are medical-spiritual maladies that we must delve deeply into and unravel, rather than putting on a useless band-aid of pharmaceuticals which only mask the symptoms. I believe healers are entering an age of enlightenment never before entered. Natural healers and physicians must be very careful about who they are learning from.

Yahweh God has all the answers despite the claims of the “Illuminated Ones.” angels from the dark side are disquieted as angels of light. Yahweh never reveal His uncontaminated wisdom to the arrogant, selfish and demonic who wish to market and sell (in the black markets) at huge profits. Those pure ones in the medical community who truly seek the healing of the hopeless suffering will be the ones whom our Creator God will grant great successful medical and spiritual exploits!

http://yahwehisking.com/new-age-healing/

It is for this reason, I share my journey with you!

I pray you, (gifted and compassionate physicians) and patients suffering a catastrophic illness will ask Father God and Jesus Christ, who created your body, mind and spirit in perfect union with Him. It is only in Him where we will find perfect rest and peace. It is only in the shelter of His wings where we will find true refuge, Psalm 91 1&2 Those who put their full trust in Him shall not ever find themselves in slavery to dark influences. Christ said “Come to me all you that are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest.” mat 11:28

Are you weary today? Are you suffering with a mysterious or bio-engineered illness? Jesus Christ, the ultimate healer is the answer! Only through Him are all mysteries revealed and perfect healing manifested. God bless you as you give him the ropes, follow His leading, adjust your lifestyle-emotional habits and diet do everything in your power to be whole!

Expect a miracle…in Jesus’ name!

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