WALK LIKE a KING


King George VI and Queen Elizabeth.jpg

I is the glory of God to conceal a thing: but the honour of kings is to search out a matter. Proverbs 25:2

Do you see the opulent glory of the king’s and Queen’s attire? Take a closer look at their stance. Do you see yourself as a King or Queen? Well, you are. The Bibles says that we are kings and priests ministering to our great and mighty God. If you are living or embracing the mindset of a pauper,  ( the choice is always ours), than it’s high time to examine the reasons being your thinking. Perhaps you were taught by your parents or teachers to  respond to life  and circumstances in a certain way. Perhaps  pastors or Sunday school teachers taught you to  decipher the scriptures in a black or white extreme or  very rigid and unmerciful. Both of these types of teaching lead to emotional and spiritual bondage and a very joyless, shallow knowledge of God’s word and person. First and second chapters of Colossians, boasts the glorious treasures  God has ordained for us to receive and walk in.

Father wishes for to be whole, healed and in living in abundance. 3 John 1:2. Why are so many brothers and sisters living defeated and miserable lives? Their very faces show the  state they are in, perpetually disgruntled, scrutinizing their brethren in grey areas of conviction and  having a negative outlook on life and the  future. No wonder non-believers have no interest in coming to Christ! Is this you, beloved?Maybe it’s time for a Holy Ghost reality check.

Why are some Christian overflowing in abundance and joy and others are in perpetual lack and depression. We can know that the joy of the Lord is our strength. In this context, Nehemiah 8:10, Joy is not an event of good fortune or a sudden happy event.  The Hebrew in this case means that we are enjoined and in the secure protection of our God! In many Psalms in the Bible, Yahweh Jehovah is our high tower, buckler and  shield. Knowing this deeply in your spirit, shoudl never cause you to stay for long periods of time in helpless depression. We are never hoepless as long as we abide in the Vine, our Savior and Lord and protective shepherd, Yashuah Jesus. Each day, we are refreshed by His rivers of living water and each new day bring new mercies.

That is good news to me and hopefully always for you too!  That[s why The Gospel of Yashuah Jesus is the good news,. Prisoners are set free…from fear, depression, poverty, witchcraft, pornography, obesity and many other generational strongholds. Luke 4:8. Brother or sister, have you received Jesus’ freedom?

It is time to embrace the revelation of Father’s covenenat promises. and it won’t be by  amassing much knowledge and studying.   Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. 2The one who thinks he knows something does not yet know as he ought to know.… 1 Cor  :1

Paul elaborates in the first and second chapters of Colossians that mystery of the Gentiles is…Christ in you. Imagine that! In Yashuah Jesus,  all the fullness of glory, dominion and honor  exists and Father Jehovah has adopted us into that kingly-Priestly heritage. Here is where Paul urges us to walk  worthy in the Lord. How do we walk worthy? Col. 1:10.  1 Peter 2:9 ,  Tells us we are now  a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.! This is tremendously exciting news to me.

We now adopted into a royal heritage a holy inheritance through Yashauh Jesus. let us no longer call ourselves wretched sinners, but a holy Priesthood! It is time to revere the sacrifice and partake of Jesus’ gift to us through His shed blood and broken body. Sadly, many of us have never received the revelation or been taught properly because their pastors walked  in the flesh and did not accept divine wisdom and revelation from Holy Spirit (Ruach HaKodesh because of legalsim and unbelief!  Countless TV pastors and ministries  are not led by Holy Spirit, but their own perceived idea of holiness. ( God will hold accountable these pastor, teachers and Rabbis who don not walk in the Spirit, but in the flesh. sadly, these blind lead the blind and many fall into the ditch or deception an lack.  But rejoice, for . Jesus Himself comforted his disciples. When He left, Father would send a comforter. They would not be left as orphans!

Oh beloved, Father has ordained for us to be so much more than we are at present. When we  abide in the limited  perception and mindsets of the old life, we choose to live as miserable paupers.

This past Saturday night, Pastor jJentezen’s  sermon was about greatness. He said greatness is not being born to a wealthy family, having a great talent or having thousands of Twitter or  Facebook followers. Pastor elaborated on what greatness truly is and that is walking worthy in the Lord. Folks, it is a decisive decision to be excellent in every area of your life! It is very hard work and being meticulous and focused, not living in any old sloppy Agape.

I’m continuing this expository after sitting outdoors under the canopy of the trees in my  back yard. The  beautiful strains of three-part harmonies of the Christian group, Second Chapter of Acts hymn, Oh Sacred Head Now Wounded  wafted through my open windowThe mournful hymn  drew me into the depth of  Christ’s suffering  as he prepared  to strengthen Himself in preparation for His next (and last)  excruciating hours of His life. I started to weep and could imagine  Him, alone  and in fearful trepidation  in the  garden of Gethsemane. Great drops of blood breaking out around His face as he begged  His Father that the cup would pass.And Thank God that it did not pass …for I would not be writing this to you now in great thankfulness for His mercy and grace!

I continued to ponder and my  heart began grow very heavy.. Thoughts came about how our nation had sunk to such depraved depths and I  whispered, “I’m so sorry Father for my sins, for our sins. Please forgive us and heal our nation”. I thought about the sex-trafficking trade and  even thought about the breaches that came from our broken covenants and relationships and even from as far back as our  forefathers. How many of us learned from our history books as young student about the plight of the Native Americans. Their portrayal was that they were  half-naked savages deserving to be conquered, humiliated, removed from their ancient land and eventually,  annihilated. . My sorrow deepened and I now understood why our intercessor leader, (so moved by Holy Spirit) had us all repent with her on our conference line for two weeks. I began to get a deep revelation of why America was losing her glorious position fast. Deep repentance, by the whole  body of Christ,  will be the only thing  that will stop God from decimating the whole nation in judgement..

I’m getting deep here folks. We have not walked as kings and priests at all, but have been as sloppy and careless as the common folk and worse than that! We may not have transgressed by the awful sins, but we haven’t opposed evil and the injustice of genocide  Rather, we have  cowered like cowards, to lazy to lift up our holy shield of faith! We see that in the last days evil will proliferate and  so mcuh so, even in God’s church.

Paul told Timothy,  But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— having a form of godliness but denying its power. 2 tim 3 1-5

On the bright side, I’m so grateful for this newly acquired gift of deep repentance gleaned from the  broken prayers of those intercessors I join with every night from 7 to 9 PM. In my 33 years of serving the Lord, repentance has rarely been mentioned. Today, Holy Spirit reminded me deeply that repentance is the first step in healing and there will be no reconciliation  in our lives regarding our broken relationships and/or covenants with each other. Broken covenants proliferate amongst God’s people.. Marriages are held together by a bare thread and the kids are rebellious and disrespectful to their parents. Personal boundaries are trample without the blink of an eye..

Early in this expository, I mentioned how Kings search out a matter. True greatness is pondering a problem and seeking God with all our hearts to resolve the issue and bring about a righteous end. Truly, all of us, if we search deeply enough, will find we’ve missed many areas. We must start to analyze our ways, repent and turn around.  saying I’m sorry  continuously without changing only perpetuates  a damaged area. Christ has called us to be transformed by His Spirit and to apply His  righteous principles to our lives and relationships. We callously disrepect  and dishonor each other by not listen em pathetically and so we wonder why we have no joy. We wonder why we are not prospering as 3 John tells us. We are covenant breakers and many of us do not understand the degree of righteousness and love we need to walk in to abide in the vine!

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Diligence is an attribute stressed on the book of Proverbs  Faithfully and persistently honing our character is a sign of greatness. When we ask Holy Spirit continually to Tweak Me, we are seeking to be conformed to His image. We are building excellently on His holy House, which is our breathers and sisters. We must have a conviction to understand the urgency of working hard to keep the unity of the brethren.This is not always easy and many of us have unrequited relationships we should ask God to heap us heal. God’s word tell us to honor each other whether they be the unborn,   military veterans suffering from PTS, the homeless, a family member struggling with a brain-emotional issue, or the elderly neighbor suffering from  dementia.

Image result for free Christian pictures of angry, judgmental people

If we examine Romans 1 28-31, most of us could admit one or several sins taint our love walks. We need to repent of and ask Father for continual cleaning. This is the type of repentance God seeks in His children. His will is for us to rise to the level of  kingly-priestly righteousness. We are to lift up holy hand and a holy, pure heart.  May we diligently search out every matter, especially our hearts…towards our Lord and then to our brethren. Only then, can we walk like a King or Queen.

Heavenly Abba Father, help us to humble ourselves under Your mighty hand. Let us be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to be angry James  1 19&20. . Help us to diligently seek out the depth of an issue, the depth of a person and the depth to which you can heal and reconcile us. Holy Spirit, help us to build bridges and not walls in our relationships with each other. Give us strength to be long-suffering and empathetic.  Most of all, help us, to  be very careful how we build upon your house.and may we choose to build with priceless materials of gold, silver and precious stones, (which are the fruits of the Spirit,  Gal 5 22&23).   In Yashuah Jesus’ matchless name, amen.

About Daughters


Pre adolecent and adolescent can be fragile  beings, driving their parents and especially fathers almost to the nuthouse. I’m a grown woman now and have weathered many family  tragedies, (including the latest, the death of my beloved Papito and my mother’s sudden plummet into Dementia…all within three months).

Today, I was very fragile and distressed, thinking about how the lack of listening with the heart has led many marriages and families to fragment. I cried out to Father for strength to make sense of the relationships in my life and realized I hadn’t read a wonderful letter from Pastor Jeff Lane, from CTN’s  call in prayer network America’s Prayer Meeting from 12;30 to 3:30 am. One sentience leaped out at me. ” My freind, you have been hurt, mistreated and unfairly judged.”  A torrent of tears burst from my eyes. Pastor Jeff’s letter continued. Blessed are the pure in heart.. in other words, blessed are those whose hearts have been cleansed from the bitterness of the world.

My issue has been being greatly wounded and traumatized by those closest to me or those who are supposed to be  my inner circle. When these are emotionally close-hearted or refused to listen and understand my weakness or person, it can be an area like  an unhealed sore. So Pastor Jeff’s  words were spot on and I asked Father to continually bless and forgive my friends who have unfairly refused to hear me out.

I hadn’t expected to compose a blog today, but  Holy Spirit used this deep, inner hurt to issue to explore this necessity of allowing heart felt communication and understanding to flow, particularity between fathers and daughters. My thoughts went back to challenging times in my father’s life where he didn’t have the support of my mother. He always turned to me, ( as his firstborn daughter). Deep down, he’d wanted his firstborn to be a son and so he never allowed my female gender to stop him from teaching me “male” attributives of leadership, discipline, resourcefulness and high education. I graciously respected and received his  guidance and all, except his insistence that we not express our frailties and emotions.

Having taken many years to heal from Papito’s demand that we never cry, all of my sisters and I paid a heavy price and the results were damaging and devastating in many ways, particularity our serious health issues. As I continue to ask Holy Spirit for the grace and healing, wisdom in understanding the psyche, (in this case, the female adolescent psyche) I hope fathers, (and mothers)  humble themselves in asking  Holy Spirit how to raise confident, androgynous, aspiring  and relaxed young women.

I’m no expert on raising great families or on having the ideal marriage, but I can definitely share what  will weaken or destroy the fiber of a marriage or family.

I’m still sorting out my feelings about my beloved father, Papito Teofilo Ferrer Cepeda, (daddy wore the name of both his mother and father proudly). His mother was a spiritually, disciplined and fiery half Latino-half  Indian who was no-nonsense, educated and taught her children well regarding self-sufficiency and excellence. When her husband, (my grandfather, Valentine) contracted a serious lung ailment, she took on the responsibility of raising nine children on her own and running her farm!

Last year, when I received a phone call from my younger,  physically-challenged sister that we needed to visit daddy in the hospital, I was shocked that yet again, there was a possibility of losing my beloved mentor. As the elevator doors opened to reveal that Mark and I were on the oncology ward of the hospital, my  heart skipped a beat. My mouth dropped open as I saw a skeletal Papito half-covered in his bed. His voice was barely audible as I took my guitar from out of its case to sing his favorite Spanish ballad, Eres Tu. I sang Amazing Grace and then my youngest sister Margarita, entered the room,  holding on to her beaus arm. Like me, she battled a neurological disorder. Hers was MS, (Multiple Sclerosis).  It was surreal, as I asked Mark to pray with my father so I could ask the nurses what was going on with him. A lovely young nurse raved about how charming and non-complaining my father was. She had never seen anyone suffering from such painful throat cancer as Teo! I started to weep, wondering what emotional ghost had brought him to this point. Even now as I write this blog, my prayer is that spouses and families will not make the same mistakes as mine.

Papito’s second wife, my step-mother was not present during my sister and my visit. I couldn’t make sense of the fact that he was in a hospital,  a three-hour driving trip away. I would have preferred for him to have hospice care near all of us girls. I played my father’s two favorite songs at his funeral and though most were moved by my testimony of my relationship with him, I was left with unrequited sorrow and no explanation of why he died the way he did.

Having learned so much the past two decades regarding the relationship between unresolved grief, bitterness and resentment precipitating cancer and other  traumatic conditions, I deduce that spouses and families must allow each other to freely express themselves! When people are faced with a traumatic episode, the shock and grief is assuaged by empathetic and non-judgmental listening  and comforting.I believe most  cases of domestic violence, child abuse and even dysfunctional-strained relationships are  caused by the person not being listened to and understood.

In my father’s case, I beloved he died of a broken heart. My mother was staunchly unsupportive of my father’s dreams and endeavors and my step-mother  had a very strong personality. Daddy preferred to keep the peace because he had developed such a fragile situation with his blood pressure over the years. Any conflict or argument would have sent him to the hospital. So, my father kept his disagreements to himself during his second marriage. I’m sure, his sorrow about his failings as a father during his and mom’s divorce and the inability to  protect his adolescent daughters was an unhealed wound.  I reckon that at least  he may have fondly remembered his dependence on us when all four of us girls helped him renovate the old, dilapidated farm  house on Shafto Road.

Honestly, that wasn’t a memorable time for me as I was suddenly transferred from a wonderful catholic school where I thrived, to a public school where I became the outcast and was bullied daily. I was not allowed to speak about my terror of the three bully girls who made me feel like dirt. I endured many painful things duirng my high school years. My sisters and I did not have the freedom to express any negative things that troubled us and thus we learned to shut up and stuff it. Anyway, what kid has the  permission to voice how miserable they are with a strong or domineering father obsessed by his dream? Many families (and many marriages) today are fragmented and dysfunctional because of lack of honesty and empathy.

Looking back, I want to bravely share my thoughts on reading a diary as a fifteen year old. My love and devotion for my father since being born-again in 1982 has always been endearing and I was shocked to read the many  turbulent and devastated emotions detailed in my journal entries.Two events in particular caused me to be ostracized for the rest of high school.My parents refused to buy me a razor to shave my legs. I was nick-named bear legs by the boys. My father also refused me to wear any blue jeans because he deduced them to be anti-establishment! So I had to wear my corny Catholic school, pleated knee length skirt and loafer shoes. My parents also never came to my defense when a large bully girl accosted me daily because I was of mixed heritage. It took decades for me to shed the skin of being unworthy and insufficient.

All this being shared, I long to see children and adolescents  soaring into their  divine destiny, their parents being well-equipped to empathetically nurture, (and appropriately discipline when needed) their kids. Children do not belong to parents. Parents are temporary stewards of God’s little people, who he is seeking to one day bless their destiny!

If my father were still alive today and asked me to honestly tell him what he could have changed about the way he raised me, this is the letter I would write to him as a grown and healing woman of God:

Dear Daddy!

Words cannot express the gratitude I have for the great things you’ve taught me. Thank you for the special times  I had with you as you taught me all about sign-painting and making silk screen templates for your job. Though I was skinny and had awful hay fever allergies and hating you taking Leslie and I to doctor Pfum to get twelve allergy shots twice a year in my arm, I was able to help you dig holes for the sign posts  Thank you for insisting that I not run the streets after boys because they would get me pregnant. Thank you for playing those amazing Spanish Flamenco albums. My love for all kinds of great music contributed to me being the eclectic and innovative composer I am today.

As a grown woman, I have truly appreciate all of who you are. You are such a charming, highly intelligent and gifted man. Thank you that even while you worked full time as a graphic designer for the US government, you earned your bachelors degree in political science so you could earn a better living for mommy and us girls!

My few regrets about our relationship was that you never allowed me to cry, to complain if I were exhausted. I would have loved for you to take seriously my greif and  shame at being half Puerto-Rican and half German, ( a weirdo and not accepted  as equal by the other kids). I also wished you had appreciated  and supported my talent in sewing, fashion design and creative writing and not say they are useless! Also, please respect that I have my own mind, I am a free spirit, (non-conformist) and  not interested in doing anything rebellious of crazy!  I know you have plans for me, but allow me to make my own choices:)  The  most painful rejection from you was when the two times I needed you most, you reneged.

When I was a boarder in the house of that alcoholic man and his blind wife and he tried to kick down my door and rape me. You said, “Be strong, honey, do the best you can.” You have no idea how that devastated me. And then when my fiance was emotionally stalking and traumatizing me and threatened me with death if I didn’t marry him. You wearily said to me,  “I’m sorry, honey. I can’t help you. I’m a sick man.”

I love you and forgive you and my Heavenly father has made right all the wrongs. I ask you to forgive me for anything I’ve hurt you with and please forgive yourself. Abba God has forgiven you, Papito.

Fathers (and mothers)..Healing and reconciliation comes from  looking deep inside yourself and remembering what you said, how you responded to your daughters cries, complaints and questions! Daughters are very complex and fragile beings, (with all these chemicals and hormonal changes). Please fathers, do your intense research early, before your little girl starts to show her womanhood. Old as I am, i am still my Papito’s little girl. I yearn every day for his hug and his “I love You, Anita.” Every day. I curse that demonic man-made tradition  men don’t cry or don’t your emotions! Pride is a killer and it’s terribly wounded and destroyed many relationships with their children. Thank you for allowing me to share about my relationship with my dear father and may you learn from his and my mistakes and help heal your relationship with your princess today!

Heavenly father, thank you for your unmerited and abundant wisdom which we have avail…if we humbly ask. Let there be healing in the fathers and daughters who read this testimony. Lord, help father to build bridges of compassion, tenderness and wisdom as they raise up, confident, trusting and joyous daughters. It’s not shameful for dads to make mistakes, but the three words, “I am Sorry” heals a multitudes of bitterness, resentment, shame and unforgiveness strongholds which could take decades to uproot in our daughters. From this day forward, Father, help us daughters to also appreciate our fathers and honor them so that our lives are long and prosperous. In Jesus name, amen

Secular Music VS Sacred Music Pt 2


So, one of my Christian  Facebook sisters  posted a  video on her Timeline.  It was David Bowie’s Video, Black Star. I was struck, at once by an ominous, disturbing feeling. Everything about the symbols and imagery made me feel sick, reminding me of the condition of the world. Truly our modern icons are preparing the new way and world.

More than ever, God’s people, His bride and the intercessors must watch and pray. This is not a time for us to ignore the demonic assaults satan has for the body of Christ and humanity. Truly, we must focus on God, His word and goodness, but the Bible  speaks of our battle being not against flesh and blood, but against  the principalities of darkness. We must be alert to prophetic end-time events and pray accordingly. These are not fear-mongering  events and propaganda, but to inform God’s people to what is happening around the world. I want to remind God’s children also about who will be cast into the  fire.

   Rev 21 6  But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

The fearful and the unbelieving are listed first! Are you  mocking the men and women of God who are watchmen? Are you scoffing that all these  reports are simply  conspiracy theories? Your soul is at high risk for sudden death. This is no joking matter and satan has had plan A, B, C and D (thru his Illuminati for many centuries) prepared for any opposing move to his plan. God’s people must heed the warnings and pray.

A recording artist shared his testimony of how his music would be marketed and what its success would entail. It was shocking to me, because since a young girl, I’ve loved the music of my favorite outrageous recording artists such as Elton John, Freddie Mercury and even led Zeppelin. I never imagined, even as a born-again  child of God, how harmful my favorites artist’s music could influence my life.

The recording artist went on to describe the  process of preparing a recording work for the public. The artist had to be initiated as a witch to produce music. Every record recorded was brought to a special room in preparation for the satanic rituals and prayers of the demonically-anointed witches. During the full moon the master is taken to the temple room  Thirteen chosen witches and warlocks decree  and declare demonic principalities over the project.

Masses of our young people are enslaved through such devices of satan. Most parents have no idea what music and entertainment their children are watching and listening to.  They need to exercise their authority and responsibility to keep tabs and  talk with their kids about what is edifying and what is negative to their emotional health and well-being. We need to explain to our children that there is a spirit behind everything. Jesus taught us that we shall know them by their fruits. Mat 7:15-17

“Beware of the false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly are ravenous wolves. 16“You will know them by their fruits. Grapes are not gathered from thorn bushes nor figs from thistles, are they? 17“So every good tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears bad fruit.…

Parents, most music icons and sports heroes are wolves in sheeps clothing, promoting idolatry, sexual impurity-perversion, greed and violence.  The godly ones who give glory to God and celebrate their Christian faith are maligned and attacked by the media, the mainstream public and atheists. Teach your kids the difference between a godly role model and a perverted one.

Parents, adults and teachers, teach kids how to examine spiritual fruit.  What fruits are are music artists like  Katy Perry, Beyonce, Madonna, and sports idol  OJ Simpson producing? It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that  sexual perversion, occult involvement and brutal murder are not conducive to the abundant lifestyle.  Christ’s  lifestyle promotes  peace that passes all understanding, emotional stability, freedom from torment,  transformation, contentment and especially divine wisdom and power! The fruit of a committed Christian should always exude those attributes which build up themselves and other people. What is is that  offends young people about Christianity that they seek after anything satanic, (witch craft, which always includes some form of torture and  blood sacrifice), hatred-genocide towards Christians or Jews and all kinds of perversion, bestiality and chaos. Is this what kids really desire? The music-entertainment industry has deceived the population that these are all okay and normal.

Here is where parental guidance is urgently needed. Adolescents and teen’s minds are not fully mature till after the age of eighteen. Thus, they aren’t able to understand the dynamic of negative choices, habits, actions and their consequences. The saddest fact about satan’s ploy against our youth is that he disguises them as glamorous and cool. Kids don’t see the outcome of a Ouija board experience or conjuring up spirits and playing with tarot cards.  I can attest by experience that any dabbling into satan’s territory produces bad fruit, or worse yet, nightmare events that  continue until true Christian deliverance occurs. Pretty daunting. My courtship with my first (now Ex) husband led me to the most terror-filled experience of my life for almost two years.

I endured extreme violence, hatred, stalking, emotional roller-coasters of him pleading for my and God’s forgiveness to him almost murdering me by smothering in our own bed! Many single and married women suffer domestic violence and misogyny (hatred and/or prejudice of women). Witchcraft is real. Curses are real. I almost died because of not being  spiritually covered by a strong, godly pastor and father. Someday, I will publish my book about my experience with demon-possessed  exes. Sadly, I suffered much and very deep emotional trauma and physical sickness because I was ignorant of satan’s extreme ability to keep me victimized and vulnerable.  Thankfully, because of staying intimate and in covenant with Abba God,  studying His word diligently and praying His word, Holy Spirit has blessed me with much more  wisdom, discernment and awareness of the strategic devices of Satan to keep Christians ensnared and defeated!

There are many scoffers who reply on these Youtube videos, saying it’s all BS, but I must bodily state the  consequences of dabbling in  the occult and being ensnared by the glossy and perverse  videos. The bottom line, folks is: the wages of sin is death! Rom 6:23.

Another evil fruit ensnaring millions of youth are debilitating depression, attempted and acts of suicide. The following is an expert from  PUB MED.gov:

The plaintiffs in a law suit alleged that the heavy metal rock band Judas Priest, and its publisher CBS, were liable for damages to two youths who shot themselves after listening to the band’s album. Crucial issues included “proximate cause” and “precipitating cause” in suicide, and the alleged role of subliminal messages. The judge ruled that although the “heavy metal” music might have had a toxic influence, the sounds and words are protected by the free speech first amendment. The influence of subliminal messages on behavior is unproven. There were many other elements in the personalities and situations of the victims to account for their self-destructive behavior.

http://www.av1611.org/rockm.html

We can also look to the Gothic subculture as another cause for young people cutting themselves to alleviate their emotional trauma.

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Evils%20in%20America/goth.htm

I remind you parents, teachers, educators, mentors and law enforcement  to be aware, confront  and assuage the ploys and attacks on our children who are being hit on every side. The Occult and New Age-tinged music and  entertainment are the main doors in which satan can access a young person’s spirit and mind. Kids who have difficulty fitting in are most often the prime targets for involvement in Gothic culture. Here is where strong, loving communication must be done regularly.  I can’t be more urgent than to ask all adults to uphold our youth in utmost prayer. I pray that these videos in my blog educate and inform you as to the seriousness of the destiny of the next generation. Keep in mind also how satan uses technology to dull the  mind of creativity, compassion and respect for life.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4905898.stm

Prayer,

Father God, we uphold our young people to you. We cry out for these impressionable souls, their destinies, their callings and well-being. Deploy your warrior angels to war against the principalities of darkness in every arena, particularly regarding the music-entertainment industry and  film.  Empower and anoint fresh, spirit-filled recording, video and  graphic artists, as well as established spirit-filled Christian producers, A&R people who own their own companies and radio stations,  to create and produce God-glorifying music, documentaries, videos, games and motion pictures,. Let their works be more alluring than anything satan could ever produce.  Strengthen spiritually, teachers, college-age youth mentors and educational leaders with salvation and  anointing. Father, we ask that there be a Holy shift in this area, in the earthly and spiritual realm, that  sexually-perverted,  violent, self-destructive negative trends and mind-sets be reversed and destroyed forever. Let a Holy Spirit anointing usurp the demonic anointing of the many music icons and sports stars which are beguiling our precious youth. We declare a reversal of mental illness- depression and suicide. Anoint your people with gifts of deliverance where they recognize demonic spirits at work and cast them out. Let your people wake up to the reality of global satanic oppression, suppression and possession of millions of precious souls! We thank You,   All Powerful Heavenly Father, for victory and miracles for this generation. in Yashuha’s Jesus name, amen.

My People Perish For Lack of Knowledge


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My People Perish for Lack of Knowledge.
A Journey of Spiritual Recovery and Revelation

It’s been quite a roller coaster ride being in the throes of my intense healing regimen as well as looking on helplessly as friends and loved ones struggle for their lives in hospitals and at home. Since my last blog, a friend lost her battle with cancer and another friend survived a brain-tumor surgery leading to his losing his faculties and lying in a pitch-black room with his covers completely shrouding him! My father has been transferred to yet another hospital. His doctors are still at a loss on how to stabilize his high blood pressure which would often suddenly elevate for no reason. At present. he is clinging to his life regarding a clot in his leg. Yesterday, another dear spiritual sister called me from the hospital suffering with an unknown malady.

I wake up each morning and say my special healing prayer with assurance that God hears my declaration of faith! But I’m heart-broken that so many of my Christian friends and family members are enduring great struggles with health and healing. I keep asking Father God for answers and I keep hearing the same refrain… “My people perish for lack of knowledge!

Thinking about all these sickness and the diminished of their quality of lives, I determine to seek wisdom and understanding. I’ve never been one to just accept adverse circumstances, especially when they deal with the break-down of our bodies. Christ remind us that surely we will have trials and afflictions, but He has given us the covenant of healing and restoration. It is His perfect will to be in good health. 3rd John 1& 2

I continue to chronicle and meditate on my spiritual and physical progress. As I research the Bible and medical sites, I continue to seek Holy Spirit’s guidance. I notice one thing in common with all my friends and loved ones when a doctor diagnoses their condition. Most of them implicitly trust in whatever the doctor prescribes, however risky or life-threatening. Now I must reiterate the problem here is not just succumbing to a serious illness, but most of these people made no effort previously to prevent the disease coming on in the first place!

Sadly, my loved ones and friends acquiesced to orthodox medicine’s way of treating disease…with drugs. I refuse to go that route, preferring to allow God’s healing to restore me. Upon seeking Him whole-heartedly, because I know He knows best, I’m gaining more understanding each day. He has been faithful because I have surrendered to His wisdom. It has been a very difficult feat to unravel the mystery of my past emotional traumas and sins meshing with the environmental constituent. Holy Spirit reminds me that body, soul and spirit are all connected. The medical community sorely lacks the understanding of this truth and millions of people are dying. Millions of people have also gotten worse because of prescription drugs. Don’t take my word for it, do your own research.

As I continue to forge forward dissecting truth from the confusing maze of information and spiritual understanding. I pray that you too will uncover the error and wrong mindsets that brought you to this place of physical and emotional breakdown in the first place! Your path and choices may be very different from mine, but I pray that the books, links and materials I share in
The number one area of healing should be to ask God first. Pray and seek Him as never before. He loves you and His Bible has all the answers you need. There are also great Bible teachers who teach the perfect way of Healing through scripture verses. They are your spiritual medicine and must be declared several times a day.

Pray and ask God about medicines the doctor prescribes. I came upon the scripture verses in Gal., 5 19-21. In almost every case, pharmaceuticals are not the best choice for healing. Some may help a serious condition, but after that, other options should be investigated. The following links are very helpful regarding what the Bible has to say about healing.

http://www.victorysdachurch.org/4-01-06ChristianModMed.doc

Another outstanding and Biblically sound link:
http://heavenshelpers.org/?id=133

http://www.truthmagazine.com/archives/volume15/TM015091.html

I want to stress the most important aspect of this blog…your thinking! Your mind is the key element to your restoration. The Bible says:

“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind”.2 Tim 1:7

The NLT (New Living Translation) translate a sound mind KJV as self-discipline.

Walking in divine health certainly does entail discipline. Daniel and his 3 friends declined eating the fine food and wine at the king’s table and asked to subsist on vegetables and water. Their pure dietary regimen which affected their health proved to the king their wisdom and discipline was beneficial to His service. God allow his people to use their free will.

You say, “I am allowed to do anything”–but not everything is good for you. You say, “I am allowed to do anything”–but not everything is beneficial. 1 Cor 10:23 NLT (New Living Translation)

That included choosing what to put in their temples! Many of God’s precious people suffer from illness and die because they refuse to discipline themselves in good nutrition! That is truth and that is fact. We reap what we sow. I am thankful that because of my desire to please my Heavenly Father in all ways, I sought to discipline myself by eating organic, becoming vegetarian, drinking pure water and exercising

Henry W. Wright’s book, “A More Excellent Way to Be in Health, has been an astounding treasure chest of spiritual healing information I have ever read! Henry delves into deepest recesses of our minds, bodies and spirit’s. Here is where I discovered the reference of my emotional mind-sets and how they influenced my health and immune system capability! I discovered that my mind was very sick because of how my mother raised me, how I responded to trauma and how doors were opened for evil spirits to gradually wear me down! Fear is one of the most powerful emotions and invite a host of other damaging perspectives and behaviors.Henry also explains how some people inherit negative behaviors and mind-sets from their parents and ancestors. The only way to realign healthy perspectives and thought patterns is to permeate the mind with the powerful Biblical scriptures. This is how God’s people overcome sickness, disease and death…through a regenerated mind!

Dr Caroline Leaf, Communication Pathologist, who holds a doctorate in Speech and Communication pathology proves that destructive thoughts can cause damage to the dendrites in our brain! Her page, Though Life show how powerful our brains are and what we can accomplish when we choose to think positively!

http://drleaf.com/thought_life.php

I’ve also broken some ground through the powerful and anointed ministry resources from Derek Prince ministries. The late Derek Prince, is a highly anointed and compassionate man of God whose demeanor is always straightforward, yet gentle. Because of his ministry, I’m coming to grips with many unconscious traumas from my past that have kept me from walking in all of God’s fullness. Many Christians seem not to struggle with ancestral curses or strongholds, but there are indeed many hapless and innocent children of God who have been enslaved by the sins and transgressions of their parents and grandparents.

Derek’s booklet “Pulling Down Strongholds” is an excellent resource as well as his DVD teaching, “How to be Delivered”. You’ll be very surprised to know that even evangelical, born-again people of God can be demonized, (oppressed) although they cannot be possessed by demons. I highly recommend these materials for anyone who is desperate to heal from an abusive past.
http://www.derekprince.org/Store/Products/1000058198/DPM_Store/Spiritual_Warfare/Spiritual_Conflict_Warfare/Pulling_Down_Strongholds.aspx

One of the best books on Divine healing, “Healing the Sick” by T.L. Osborne is resplendent with uplifting scriptures, testimonies and Bible truths for the sick or dying.

If you have given up on traditional ways of healing, I guarantee your hope will be rekindled when you surrender your life to the Lord! These resources I’ve shared have so enlightened me regarding the issue of healing. Each day, presents itself with renewed hope as the Holy Spirit remove all my past heartaches, old negative thought patterns and traumatic incidents that scarred me for so long. Discipline yourself to start a new regimen, starting with prayer, praise and quiet time with the Lord. Stay focused. You have to remind yourself, you are forming a new positive, Christ lifestyle. The Holy Spirit will give you new revelation and you find yourself invigorated as His word recharges your drained spiritual batteries!

I have only love, compassion and great excitement for your new life in Christ through His divine healing pattern. I must admit also, that pursuing a music career used to be my focus, but Father God allowed the breakdown of my health to seek Him with all my heart!

I’ve been drawn to the book of Proverbs, one of my favorite books and chock full of ageless wisdom. But Jer. 6:16 fits in with many of the Proverbs

“Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the
good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.

God tell us, “My ways are not your ways and your thought not my thoughts.” Nothing we could do, think or say could compare with God’s magnitude of wisdom and understanding. The wonderful thing about our heavenly Father is that He is eager and willing to share all of His knowledge and guidance…if we ask Him first!

5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. James 1:5 NIV

If a child of God wants to be successful, he must make it a practice to ask God first…about everything. The ancient, (Hebrew translation is must seek for the ancient paths ( the original translation of ancient is “heavenly.” So then, everything about God and what he wants to give us is divine…from above. As we allow Christ to transform our minds into His mind,we unlearn the old, futile and negative ways from the world, our parents upbringing and our own ideas. How urgent then it is for parents and teachers to guide children in the ways of God so they can prosper!

As you heal, remember to thank Him…even if it hurts.

It’s kind of funny, that having had a very successful tenure as a teacher of youth at Youth Advocate Program, Eatontown, NJ and behavior modification counselor at Nutri-System weight-loss centers, I am presently apprenticing under the Lord. I’m starting over and re-learning God’s pattern of life, health and success!

I hope to obey God’s word to be tender-hearted and nurture you all in wisdom and love. Many of you have been deeply wounded and have no idea how to break out of your old prison May of you have poor or no information. Many of you have had harsh parents, teachers, pastors, priests or rabbis who led you down the wrong path…of legalistic religion.

I hope to remind teachers to be very careful in our ministry to the fragile souls, (and even with ourselves) as we address deep unconscious areas that need God’s special healing!

We are to be tender-hearted (1 Peter 3:8, 1 Tim 5:1, Eph 4:32) to all. We are called to tell the truth in love.. Oh, how we need good, anointed teaching and good nurturing. Choose carefully who you will learn under. Most of what I’ve learned the hard way is by making my own mistakes The areas of dating/courting, nutrition, health-medicine are sorely lacking.

Know that to be blessed with knowledge and understanding is to be like searching for hidden treasure. Prov. 2 3&4

Derek Prince mentioned in his book that God’s people need to learn to think. That is the mistake most of us make when we become Christians. We seem to lose the ability to think for ourselves when we get under a pastor. That is why it is so important to study God’s word under the guidance of the Holy Spirit and to ask God to learn and grow under a loving and wise pastor! We have to learn to get deep and ask God for the very specifics.

Father I ask for your divine wisdom today for the reader of this post. I declare a divine connection between them and You, Lord. Open up the well springs of your wisdom and knowledge so they can declare your works and majesty. Holy Spirit, guide and enlighten them with all truth. Cleanse every area of their minds and help them to walk in the path of Divine healing starting now. In Jesus’ name, I thank you and pray. Amen!

REJOICE! And again I say, REJOICE!


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REJOICE! And again I say Rejoice!

Are you weary, my brother or sister? Has the enemy buffeted you so that you drag your feet?
This morning as I focused on resting and meditating on the Lord’s word, I recalled that few of my closest brothers & sisters in Christ have not called or visited. I stopped to visit a few, only to find no one home. I sent cards and packages…no response. Only recently, certain brethren and I spent time worshiping and in prayer. Where was everybody? I know many are struggling with illnesses and hospitalization of their family members, but I’m disappointed to be disconnected with my prayer partners.

I also know that spiritual attacks of God’s people are increasing.  Satan’s  host work full-time,  wreaking havoc across the globe. Many are struggling with physical ailments and depression.

As I tune in to the Pastor Janet’s Ellsworth’s  prayer meeting on CTN Christian network each night from 12:30 am to 3:30 am, I’m saddened to hear so many callers requesting prayer for  troubled family members, suicidal children and serious illnesses. As I pray, I wonder how she never seems flustered or overwhelmed at the great amount of suffering of people who call in.Pastor Janet  is  an amazing spirit-filled woman of God and a wonderful role model for me as I try to encourage my brothers and sisters to keep running the race and stay close to the Lord.

http://www.ctnprayer.com/

I remind you, beloved, that  now is not the time to be slack and allow the cares of the world, family members self-centered issues and worldly strife’s to deter you from your Christian duty. I’m here to compel you to attention. I’m here to stir up the gift that are within you.  Don’t be weary in well-doing, for you will reap if you DON’T faint. Gal 6:9

When you start to get lazy and spiritually weak, recount God’s word! Remember your royal heritage. You are Kings & Priests. Minister to Him in your priesthood regardless of how you feel. 1 Pet 2:8 and  Rev. 1:6 We are also His workmanship Eph 2:10. Everyone of us has a distinct calling in this dark hour. Running God’s race in these dark hours requires great diligence and persistence. If we want God to continue blessing & strengthening us, we must reserve reverent worship and meditation time with Him.

Rejoice for He inhabits the praises of His people. In everything, give thanks, 1 Thes 5:18.  Rejoice for we are seated with Jesus in heavenly places! Eph 2:6 and are partakers of His divine nature and we are given His great & precious promises.  2 Pet 1:4. We are the accepted in the beloved.

So I urge you this day, BELOVED to Focus on who you are in Christ and what belongs to you! Don’t give place to satan where he draws your attention to  personal struggles, family conflicts, job stressors and threatening world events. Paul reminded Timothy, “No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier” Our first obligation is to abide under the shadow of the almighty Psalm 91 and enter His rest..Heb 4:11

I pray for you to be refreshed by this blog.

Paul reiterated to the Philipians, “Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice!”

I encourage you all to enter His rest today and even during the busy week, if even for only 15 minutes or a half an hour. Stop, count, (writing down your blessings is even better) and Praise Him! Praise refreshes the soul.

Rejoice I say and Praise Him!

MARCHING TO THE BEAT OF A DIFFERENT DRUM


Part One

Journal Entry, November 22, 2011

Since that bold day of reckoning as a thirteen year old, galumphing up the short stairway onto the bus in silver platform boots, I was declaring that I was not like all the other straight-haired, alabaster-skinned and bell-bottomed pretty girls attending Monmouth regional high school.  Though many saw me as a nondescript mixed girl with long curly hair, cafe-au-lait skin and a downward, shy gaze. I possessed a powerful imagination where I often retreated to find shelter from the alienation of being unnoticed. The pretty white girls always were laughing and surrounded by the cool, cute guys. I longed to be like one of them.

And so, I designed trendy, colorful fashions, composed my poetry and daydreamed that one day I’d be surrounded by a bevy of admiring, important VIPs and was sought after for my skills.

My mother’s lady friend bought over a bag of used clothing filled treasures that I  claimed as my own, two pairs of size 7 bell-bottoms,  stretcher  tops and the brand new silver  platform boots. I was going to wear them and prove I was brave and unique.  My heart beat as the bus stopped for my sister and I and I prayed I wouldn’t trip as I made my way up the stairs to my seat near the front.

I was never the same after that day. All the pretty, long-haired popular girls who sat at the  rear of the bus giggled and stared at my feet. Though I was shaking in my boots, I made my point. I was going to be different and never again be ashamed of who I was.

Now the other kids would see that I wasn’t a shy, bi-racial geek. Thus began my life-long struggle to be accepted and cherished

My journey to wholeness took over three decades and opened my heart and mind to the many injustices and inequalities that plagued society, but especially creative and “different” girls and women. I’m still trying to figure out why we women are still not taken as seriously as men, but I do know that I’ve  had my share of men who were not enamored by my free-spiriedness and passion to create non-conventional art and music.

Perhaps because of being of mixed ancestry, I loved merging opposing and unique  components and this creative tendency brought out some very interesting creations.

I was also famished for any  non mainstream knowledge and information to better the world around me and change perceptions of people who generally  thought the same way.  I kept looking upward, listening to that still, small voice and understanding some very highly advance ways of doing things.

I wanted to gather all things healing empowering and beautiful and force people to taste and see how good they were, but realized that receiving, applying and understanding them was a difficult endeavor. I lived in a fast-paced and materialistic society and people were not excited about waiting for results.

Continuing my quest to understand the societal chaos that has resulted from this micro-wave  mentality, I trudge seeking to be emotionally and spiritually transformed in my thinking and perception in the hopes that some I connect with in my travels will listen and heed.

People who march to the beat of a different drum seem to always be greatly misunderstood and maligned.  They have to suffer great loneliness and criticism from others who, rather than barnstorm and share ideas,  ignore, mock or attack.  Some are inwardly jealous to see the freedom and joy of those who aspire to living creative, exceptional and fulfilling lives. Some are fearful that they don’t have the courage to step out in faith and freedom and others are hateful and attack viciously.

I see our materialistic society, addicted to cold technology  as fast losing  its soul, divine potential and beauty.  I belong to a dying breed, but I vow to live a transparent and unfettered  life which offers life, healing and inward transformation.  My calling has brought me to some unimaginable places of the heart and soul, but often it’s like pushing against a massive boulder. I’ve worn myself out in the process, but this passion to attain the spiritually expansive has led me to venturing to steep cliffs. there, I free-fall into the cavernous expanse of an unfathomable God who has revealed to me hidden treasures of the heart and soul.

That  is why I write the songs I write, sing the songs I sing and believe in a God who most do not, (or refuse to) see. It has been a very lonely existence, but that inner voice within me would have it no other way.  I must write about suffering and sorrow, loss and hope, dying and being resurrected. I f I have not hope, I have nothing.

My journey encompasses all the groanings and celebrations of one not ashamed to reveal the ugliness and shame of the unredeemed, but  also the glories of one willing to submit to the soul surgery by the Creator of the universe. In only this I can relish my existence. It is this hope that I continue to forge forward in transparency as I express the devastation of those caught in bondage and suffering. You will not find your destiny in your Blackberry, I-pod or Facebook games.  Modern technology has beguiled you and trapped you in her vise. Can you ever escape? I doubt it, unless you delve into your humanity deeply, daily and seriously. Death is not the ending of physical life, but the squelching constricting of a mind devoid of empathy, natural beauty and hope.

This is a dying world, but there are still some dinosaurs who are still resilient and willing to stand amidst the machine gun fire.

I hope some will listen as I share this precious gift with the few willing to humble themselves of themselves. Truths’ obscure whisper  can still be heard despite all the clamor going on. I will continue to write my  poems, lyrics and essays in the hopes that darkened, jealous, greedy and bitter minds be illuminated.

Please listen. Truth is calling.